{n.} The degree to which a male possesses the capacity for raising a flaccid, favorite organ to an upright or distended positon (e.g., a man's "sleeping" penis or -- as is the case with a male sage grouse or frigatebird -- an uninflated gular sac).
EXAMPLE:
' A unique physical feature of male great frigate birds was also bound to attract the attention of immature human males concerned with erectile performances of their own sex organs. Each male great frigate bird at mating time tried to attract the attention of females by inflating a bright red balloon at the base of his throat. At mating time, a typical rookery when viewed from the air resembled an enormous party for human children, at which every child had received a red balloon. The {Galápagos} island would in fact be paved with male great frigate birds with their heads tilted back, their qualifications as husbands inflated by their lungs to the bursting point—while, overhead, the females wheeled.
' One by one the females would drop from the sky, having chosen this or that red balloon.
" After Mary Hepburn showed her film about the great frigate birds, some student, . . . almost invariably a male, was sure to ask, sometimes clinically, sometimes as a comedian, sometimes bitterly, hating and fearing women: "Do the females always try to pick the biggest ones?"
' So Mary was ready with a reply: "To answer that, we would have to interview female great frigate birds, and no one has done that yet, so far as I know. Some people have devoted their lives to studying them, though, and it is their opinion that the females are in fact choosing the red balloons which mark the best nesting sites. " '
-- From Kurt Vonnegut's 1985 novel "Galápagos" -- Ch. 20 (p. 114).
' A unique physical feature of male great frigate birds was also bound to attract the attention of immature human males concerned with erectile performances of their own sex organs. Each male great frigate bird at mating time tried to attract the attention of females by inflating a bright red balloon at the base of his throat. At mating time, a typical rookery when viewed from the air resembled an enormous party for human children, at which every child had received a red balloon. The {Galápagos} island would in fact be paved with male great frigate birds with their heads tilted back, their qualifications as husbands inflated by their lungs to the bursting point—while, overhead, the females wheeled.
' One by one the females would drop from the sky, having chosen this or that red balloon.
" After Mary Hepburn showed her film about the great frigate birds, some student, . . . almost invariably a male, was sure to ask, sometimes clinically, sometimes as a comedian, sometimes bitterly, hating and fearing women: "Do the females always try to pick the biggest ones?"
' So Mary was ready with a reply: "To answer that, we would have to interview female great frigate birds, and no one has done that yet, so far as I know. Some people have devoted their lives to studying them, though, and it is their opinion that the females are in fact choosing the red balloons which mark the best nesting sites. " '
-- From Kurt Vonnegut's 1985 novel "Galápagos" -- Ch. 20 (p. 114).
by Dinkum August 24, 2013
1. (n) description of a drunken person's actions from the night before. To qualify, the actions must be embarrasing and unremembered by the drunk.
1. Wow, Jeremy, that was a stellar performance last night.
2. -Guys what did I do last night?! -Dude, you had a stellar performance.
2. -Guys what did I do last night?! -Dude, you had a stellar performance.
by Jeremy Jenkins October 16, 2004
A process where some cunt you're forced to spend far too much time with sits you down and wastes an hour of your life every year telling you how wonderful they are and how rubbish you are in order to justify their own meaningless existence and make them feel powerful.
The degree of shit you'll receive generally depends on how well you've covered up the cunt's mistakes over the year and also depends on how brown your tongue is from ass licking over the year.
To be treated with utter contempt unless you are a brown tongued ass licker in which case you can fuck off. PS your colleagues hate you.
The degree of shit you'll receive generally depends on how well you've covered up the cunt's mistakes over the year and also depends on how brown your tongue is from ass licking over the year.
To be treated with utter contempt unless you are a brown tongued ass licker in which case you can fuck off. PS your colleagues hate you.
Manager: It's time for your Performance Review
Employee: Woo! I can't wait for this valuable loopback session!
Fast forward for an hour:
Manager: So in summary, you've met all of your objectives all year and been a key member of the team. We're not giving you a pay award however as you've had a haircut that was outside of our dress code and appearance policy and took a day off when your father died and expected to be paid for it.
Employee: Woo! I can't wait for this valuable loopback session!
Fast forward for an hour:
Manager: So in summary, you've met all of your objectives all year and been a key member of the team. We're not giving you a pay award however as you've had a haircut that was outside of our dress code and appearance policy and took a day off when your father died and expected to be paid for it.
by HR_Advisory January 3, 2012
When one is performing on stage, or is really nervous and pops a boner. Most likely when it is ones first time on stage. Just to be safe, make sure you always wear a cup and compression boxers to prevent this terrible predicament.
That was Joe's first time on stage, and he popped a performers boner, and now is the laughing stock of the school.
by Pseudonym Anon November 4, 2009
“Hey, have you seen her posts about BLM?”
“Yeah she’s sharing everything she comes across, so annoying.”
“Yeah man, perfect example of performance activism - how embarrassing.”
“Yeah she’s sharing everything she comes across, so annoying.”
“Yeah man, perfect example of performance activism - how embarrassing.”
by HelloPoppet June 8, 2020
A kent washington based import performance shop that caters to the import community of the pacific northwest, as well as major engine builds, custom turbo kits, importing all sorts of JDM goodness, as well as matience work to keep your car running its best.
by james mercado January 27, 2008
A term used by motorcyclists to describe a speeding ticket in an amusing light. Motorcyclists tend not to obey speed limits.
by nycubergeek September 25, 2005