hedge hog

v. To attempt (and/or to accomplish) self-felattio (also used as a gerund)

I came home early and saw my son and all his friends hedge hogging by the pool. They said, "It isn't gay if you suck your own dick."

by Dark Mozier September 25, 2009

hedge hog

Nick-name of the famous male porn star Ron Jeremy. Assume he was given this nick-name because of his chubby appearance, and his oral skills on the late 70's, early 80's poorly groomed, female genitalia, featured in most of the movies he starred in.

I saw Ron Jeremy in a porno today. The Hedge Hog was gettin' it done.

by J to the A December 21, 2011

hedge hog

A man you encourage your daughter to date, wed, or procreate with so you have a hedge fund for your non existent social security. Also known as "Fat F@#$%." Guys that have no other redeeming quality than a paycheck. Also see
"Mr. Collins" from Pride & Prejudice.

I used to be worried about my retirement, until my daughter
found her new hedge hog on e-harmony.

I don't know what I would do without my hedge hog fund... I am so glad I decided to procreate when I was 16, now I can retire at 35.

by floorfly November 30, 2010

Hedge-hog

a nasty girl that you wouldn't let even your enemy screw! Also known as a hedgie

a fat chic with rotten teeth and tits that sag to her beltline! dirty, Hairy, Stinky and bears children from many different men, this is a HEDGE-HOG!!

by joedud February 26, 2009