crusty sideburns Share definition Flag When pieces of feces tangles in your ass hair and all the way down to your inner thigh hair. Man, while cleaning his ass Dean diagnosed himself with Crusty Sideburns. crusty sideburns by O and A pest from AZ February 5, 2015 0 0 Get merch Get the crusty sideburns mug. Buy Now — $32.95 See more merch