columns 

A neverending puzzle game made originally for sega's 16bit arcade hardware and ported to the Megadrive.

Was later ported to the 8bit Master System but the less said about that the better.

Often wrongly referred to as a "tetris clone" as the gameplay is completley different - colored gems must be aligned together to destroy them and prevent them filling the screen. Columns pwns Tetris' ass all night long

This was where the fun began, Without the arcade's timing system constantly badgering you for money you are free to start a game of colums and forfeit the rest of the day. The haunting music in your dreams for eternity.

Eventually as the game speeds up the gems can be slowed by "dropping" them, but by this stage you aint blinked in an hour and the game seems to be playing itself any way.

More adictive than crack; A truly great game.

Is basically a metaphor for life, but I aint got time to explain

A universal excuse for not doing something.

I got home from school and started a game of columns, next thing I knew, my alarm clock was going off.

Teacher: Where's your homework??
Student: Well... You see I was gonna do it but I started a game of columns
Teacher: OK, have it as soon as you can, you should go home and get some sleep, you look terrible.

columns by Da Zeg March 27, 2005

Add an extra column 

This term is reserved for supervisors who you as a subordinate brief your way out of a jam on an excel spreadsheet. This can be most conviently described as when you are giving a briefing of some sort, like on an excel spreadsheet. And when you explain or brief your way out of a problem. The supervisor or boss will just add an extra column and you then fucked again.

What the fuck man? I thought you had briefed your way out of that jam. Yeah me too until that asshat pulled out the add an extra column to the spreadsheet. Yeah I know he did pull out the ball bag musket on you.

Add an extra column by pantyteamaster October 21, 2010

Fifth Columnist 

A fifth column is a group of people who clandestinely undermine a larger group such as a nation from within. A fifth column can be a group of secret sympathizers of an enemy that are involved in sabotage within military defense lines, or a country's borders. A key tactic of the fifth column is the secret introduction of supporters into the whole fabric of the entity under attack.

Bobby: Not ironically, Fifth Columnist rhymes with Filthy communist.
Joe: You got me there, Bobby, I have no idea.
Bobby: Yeah, right.

Fifth Columnist by Chaotic_Neutral October 20, 2012

Column FU 

The Default title of column “FU” in every Excel spreadsheet should be the name of your office a-hole. In our office, Mike is the hands down winner...

Everyone in our office changed Column FU in their Excel spreadsheets to “Mike”. That way when Mike is being really annoying in a meeting or conference call you can scroll over to bring that up on your screen. Even better if you are presenting...

Column FU by Poway Guy November 14, 2017

fifth column 

A group within a state that attempts to subvert and weaken the state in order to assist an enemy. First used during the Spanish Civil War.

The characterization of leftists in the United States as a Communist 'fifth column' by the McCarthyist witchhunters survives today in post-9/11 America; only now Arabs and Muslims are blacklisted.

fifth column by LudwigVan October 1, 2004

Columni 

A graduate of Columbia University, Columbia College, or a similarly named school.

The trustees have been hitting me up for money ever since I've become a Columni.

Columni by Steve Hofstetter April 17, 2004

2nd Column Shopper 

When someone shops based on the price alone instead of the actual item they are buying, derived from the fact that most websites, menus and whatnot lists their price on the 2nd column. In other words, either a cheapskate or automatically assuming the most expensive option is best (open to interpretation).

1. "Mary only bought a side of eggs because it was the cheapest option on the menu, and she's still hungry. What a 2nd column shopper."
2. "Mike just got $100K car, but completely ignoring the fact that it has the reliability of a heroin junkie having withdrawal. Gotta love people who only look at the 2nd column!"

2nd Column Shopper by edw007 January 23, 2019