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A football based game when there is a goal keeper (only 1.) and outfeild players. (no limit to players.)

It is advised NOT to play this game against a wall as it doesent work as well as it can cause arguments and maybe a fight.

The aim of the game is you must volley or head the ball in the goal against the goal keeper a certain amount of times (amount of times can be choosen. Must be a limit of 5 or over.) The goal keeper is 1 team. He has no other team mates.

When you reach the last goal needed, you MUST head it in. This is called "doggy." If you score it with a volley in this time you are automaticly in goal.

You can NOT set your self up with a volley OR header as it is devised as cheating.

For the goal keeper to get another player to go in goal and get him out, he must catch the ball before it hits the ground. The last player to touch the ball when its caught is in goal, this counts for reflections. After which the goal keeper is an outfeild player and the person who had the ball caught is in goal.

If you hand-ball the ball, you are automaticly in goal and the goal keeper becomes an outfeild player.

When all the goals have been scored and "doggy" has been scored, the present-time goal keeper must have the ball pelted at him from 20 foot-steps out. The reason this game is called ass'es is because he must bend over and have the ball shot at his ass!

All the outfeild players (and even the ones who were in goal in the past) has a shot at his ass. they all get 1 shot each.

If a player makes perfect conection with his shot, he may take another shot OR give it to another player.

If you score a goal WITHOUT volleying it or heading it at any point in the game you are automaticly in goal.

The reason you shouldent play this against a wall is if your an outfeild player, and you kick the ball out for a goal kick, you are AUTOMATICLY in goal, even if you head it or volley it!
Callan: Come on lads, its "doggy", score the bloody goal so we can finsh this game of Ass'es

*oli heads it in*

Everyone: YESSSSSSS!!!

*Ashly gets ass pelted by ball*
Ass'es by shaun1 August 24, 2006
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Ghost of Ass(es) Past 

one who looks like they should be blessed with a phatty but then they turn around and it looks like a crack in an eggshell
Dammnn she's fine, ohp nvm she got cursed with the Ghost of Ass(es) Past .

Ass-essment 

The act of a person checking out another person's tail/butt/behind or ass
While Damian was at the gym, he took a quick ass-essment of the girl who walked right by him. Turns out Damian wasn't the only one who did that as he saw the dude lifting weights also got a quick peek.
Ass-essment by sillyboi February 27, 2019

Ass-essing the situation

Scanning the area and spotting out all the girls with a nice ass
Bob: look... over there i see so many nice asses
Steve: are you Ass-essing the situation?

pure ass essence 

The smell of a pure ass smell and for more purity the word essence is added!
That smells like pure ass essence man!
pure ass essence by andezzat April 24, 2010

Go Real Estate On Your Ass 

"Go Real Estate On Your Ass" is another way to threaten someone with violence. It stems from a clip on MadTV, in which people get rich by threatening to attack home owners with a machete, unless the home owner gives the attacker their house.

YouTube Keyword: madtv real estate
Regular Person: You knock it off or I'll go real estate on your ass!

Gangster: Y'all better cut the shit yo, or I be goin' real estate on yo @$$. Yo.

Essence's Ass

The best ass ever it is big juicy and thick asf
asf-as fuck
Dude #1:Omg look over there.
Dude #2:What?
Dude#1:Essence's ass is big and juicy Ima hit.
Essence's Ass by Yep18 December 17, 2016