dont know your ass from the ass end of a bowling ball 

dont know your ass from the ass end of a bowling ball similar to dont know your ass from a hole in the ground a little more funny

you mister president dont know your ass from the ass end of a bowling ball

dont know your ass from the ass end of a bowling ball by bluebear March 31, 2020

a rinsed ball 

A golf ball that after being struck, lands in water (pond, lake, stream, ocean).

Announcer: That ball was hit far right, and is headed towards the creek! He'll be VERY lucky if that does'nt end up "a rinsed ball"!

a rinsed ball by talk2me-JCH2 August 21, 2022

Sharp as a Beach Ball 

Not too bright and certainly not sharp!
Usefully juxtaposed to something really sharp.
The opposite of "sharp as a razor" - clearcut and incisive.

That guy is as sharp as a beach ball - he didn't even realise the girls were teasing him when they fell on the floor laughing! He was well taken in!

Sharp as a Beach Ball by Brian Butterly February 13, 2007

A lost ball in high weeds 

A person who does not know what they are doing, how to do it or possibly even where they are.

John: "What are you doing here!? You can't be here, its dangerous!"

William: "I'm sorry, I got confused as to where i'm supposed to be."

John: "Dude, you're a lost ball in high weeds."

A lost ball in high weeds by Jayy1989 April 15, 2010

i came in like a wrecking ball 

A sentence used to show the destruction of property, people and/or brain cells

Person 1: oh my goodness! What happened to you?! You look horrible!

Person 2: I came in like a wrecking ball....

i came in like a wrecking ball by cattaylor January 13, 2014

hung a curve ball

making a stupid comment leaving yourself open for a wise crack in return

John: That girl won't fuck nobody after me.
Bill: You were such a bad lay you turned her lezzie. . . sorry dude, I had to say that.
John: Hell, I hung a curve ball, you had to take me down town.

hung a curve ball by Sweet Shorty Swoll August 30, 2006

I don´t have a crystal ball 

Snarky remark you make when feeling between a rock and a hard place, because you are demanded to take a decision you are powerless, incapable, or unwilling to take.

Headline: "I don´t have a crystal ball", President Obama said when asked about a five-year Afghanistan exit strategy.

I don´t have a crystal ball by rperazag July 1, 2010