Simply put: the worst book ever to be published.
It's cliched, has no actual plot, sends out bad messages, is anti-feminist, has puple prose, etc etc.
It's fans are usually teeny bopper fan-girls who don't know the meaning of real literature, and who would kill you if you have a different oppinion. It's sad, really.
It's cliched, has no actual plot, sends out bad messages, is anti-feminist, has puple prose, etc etc.
It's fans are usually teeny bopper fan-girls who don't know the meaning of real literature, and who would kill you if you have a different oppinion. It's sad, really.
Twilight fangirl: Twilight fricken ROCKS, right? Edward's soooo hot!!!
Normal person: No! It reads like fan-fiction written by a 12 year old girl.
Twilight fangirl: *gasp* HOW DARE YOU?! *jumps up and down like a raving lunatic*
Normal person: *walks away*
Normal person: No! It reads like fan-fiction written by a 12 year old girl.
Twilight fangirl: *gasp* HOW DARE YOU?! *jumps up and down like a raving lunatic*
Normal person: *walks away*
by noname191 August 24, 2009
that book by stephenie meyer which caused the vampire genre to be classified as a "teenage love-story" instead of "badaas stories of hardcore blood drinkers". teenages girls eat this shit up for some reason.
Teenage Girl:OMG ILOVE TWILIGHT EDWARD IS SO HOT!!!1!!!ONE!!!!11!!!1!
Chuck Norris:*roundhouse kick*
Mr.T:SHUT UP, FOOL!
Kool-Aid Man:OH YEAH!
Chuck Norris:*roundhouse kick*
Mr.T:SHUT UP, FOOL!
Kool-Aid Man:OH YEAH!
by ShatteredBomb February 5, 2009
by bagbird January 10, 2009
A Young Adult Fiction book/series with vampire thrown in for the hell of it. Is commonly (and wrongly) mistaken for a fantasy book when it is clearly not. Many teenage and (sadly) child girls have become sucked into the fad that it Twilight and they have no idea what a real vampire is because the vampires in Twilight sparkle in the sun instead of burning and they do not have fangs.
Also, the main girl cannot think for herself
Also, the main girl cannot think for herself
Fangirl: OMG!!!!! I LOOOOOOOOOVE TWILIGHT!!!! IT'S SO REALISTIC!!!!!!!! I WANT AN EDWARD!!!!!
Normal, non-obsessed girl/(more likeley)boy: Uhuh, riiiight
Normal, non-obsessed girl/(more likeley)boy: Uhuh, riiiight
by ActDanceSing February 20, 2010
A cliche, overrated, horrid series based on a wet dream of a woman named Stephanie Meyers. A 107 year old virgin vampire (he sparkles!) named Edward falls in love with a clumsy, unattractive girl named Bella, whom many believe to be autistic. He thinks she smells good and watches her sleep. Werewolves and mean vampires try to eat her because she smells just so delicious. But Edward won't eat her because he is a vegetarian! So instead he just randomly grabs her hand out of nowhere and takes a nice big whiff of it. Bella keeps almost dying as various vampires rape, track down, and videotape her. After three nauseatingly awful books, the last one finally comes out where Bella turns into a vampire, Edward gives her a C-section with his teeth, and they have a demon child the vampire mafia wants to destroy. They name in something equally retarded as 'Jasper' or 'Carlisle', some members of Edward's family.
There. I just saved you three weeks of your life you could never get back.
You're welcome.
There. I just saved you three weeks of your life you could never get back.
You're welcome.
"Twilight is gay."
"Edward's shiny diamond skin turns me on!"
"I can't live without my perverted old boyfriend."
"I'm danger, stay away."
"I want to eat you."
"Edward's shiny diamond skin turns me on!"
"I can't live without my perverted old boyfriend."
"I'm danger, stay away."
"I want to eat you."
by Liv Marie February 6, 2009
Twilight is a novel and four book series that claims to be a "saga" for false advertisement. Twilight has no actual plot, it strays from its own cannon that it creates, the main characters are cliché and lack developing personalities, and it is void of any spiritual and intellectual value. It lacks in the 7 literary standards of literature and is thus bad literature. Twilight is basically a cash cow, not uncommon in early 21st century mass media. It is Mormon propaganda that slips in sexist standards of men and women , abstinence only views, and false ideals of love into the underdeveloped minds of adolescent girls. It is the incarnation of Stephanie Meyer's ultimate sexual fantasy.
Twilight is told in the point of view of a "boring" "ordinary" clumsy teenage girl named Bella Swan who moves to Forks. Bella is evidently a bitchy, selfish, shallow self insertion Mary Sue. She has no actual personality flaws and her clumsiness is ostensibly a Moe weakness.
For reasons unexplained to the readers, everyone at her new school likes her on her first day at school and five guys fall in love with her, including Edward Cullen. Edward is a "vegetarian vampire" and sparkles in the sun light. He is perfectly beautiful, has no weaknesses, and is an immortal century old virgin with the appearance of a 17 year old. He is a Gary Stu. Bella and Edward fall in love with each other for reasons unexplained to the readers. Bella apparently loves Edward because she is obsessed with his perfect good looks and Edward apparently loves Bella because she smells good. Thus their entire relationship is based on obsessive sexual attraction. In fact, the whole world of Twilight revolves around their relationship.
Edward is over an abusive controlling stalker that watches Bella in her sleep. Bella excuses Edward actions as being “over protective”. Bella is utterly dependent on Edward, so much that she goes into a chronically depressed and suicidal state when he dumps her.
Twilight is told in the point of view of a "boring" "ordinary" clumsy teenage girl named Bella Swan who moves to Forks. Bella is evidently a bitchy, selfish, shallow self insertion Mary Sue. She has no actual personality flaws and her clumsiness is ostensibly a Moe weakness.
For reasons unexplained to the readers, everyone at her new school likes her on her first day at school and five guys fall in love with her, including Edward Cullen. Edward is a "vegetarian vampire" and sparkles in the sun light. He is perfectly beautiful, has no weaknesses, and is an immortal century old virgin with the appearance of a 17 year old. He is a Gary Stu. Bella and Edward fall in love with each other for reasons unexplained to the readers. Bella apparently loves Edward because she is obsessed with his perfect good looks and Edward apparently loves Bella because she smells good. Thus their entire relationship is based on obsessive sexual attraction. In fact, the whole world of Twilight revolves around their relationship.
Edward is over an abusive controlling stalker that watches Bella in her sleep. Bella excuses Edward actions as being “over protective”. Bella is utterly dependent on Edward, so much that she goes into a chronically depressed and suicidal state when he dumps her.
"Bella got a 90 on the Mary Sue Litmus test. Edward got a 124. Twilight belongs in fanfiction.net."
"Twilight raped vampire lore."
"Twilight is for lonely fat girls who shop at Hot Topic and illiterate rabid fangirls who will pluck your eyes out if you don't agree that Twilight is better than Shakespeare."
"Twilight is shit."
"Twilight raped vampire lore."
"Twilight is for lonely fat girls who shop at Hot Topic and illiterate rabid fangirls who will pluck your eyes out if you don't agree that Twilight is better than Shakespeare."
"Twilight is shit."
by Teufel Luke January 1, 2009