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A theodorian is someone who makes the claim in which Theodore is receiving the best head among the 3 chipmunks. Despite the many adversities including verbal abuse from normie alvinists, and general ignorance throughout the chipmunist community, the theodorians still are able to stand their ground as valid theorists. This is likely because the theodorian theory disregards unimportant factors such as attractiveness and popularity of the female chipmunks (both of which have been proven to be unrelated to the enjoyment of one's head), and instead takes note of the more complex evidential reasons.

The theodorian theory, at its heart, takes into account the level of each chipmunks sexual stimulus. Using this method, we can make the assumption that because Alvin is the most popular and alpha of the 3 chipmunks, he has likely already received head multiple times. Theodore, on the other hand, is most likely getting head for the very first time, and it is commonly assumed that he has not even masturbateed before. If these assumptions are true, then Theodore, at the time of the picture, had never had an orgasm before in his life. He then, conclusively, would have by far the highest sexual stimulus of the 3 chipmunks.
The theodorian theory is the most widely accepted theory among chipmunkist intellectuals.
via giphy
by tedlywinks September 19, 2019
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Used to describe those who believe Theodore of Alvin and the Chipmunks is receiving the best head, however, it may also be used to describe someone as a genius among men.
"Wow, who's that kid who got a perfect score on the SAT?"
"Oh, that's Joseph. He's a Theodorian."
"He's so hot!"
by Theodorian September 20, 2019
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Stemming from a Rule 34 image posing the question: β€œWhich Chipmunk is Getting the Best Head”, the image shows Alvin and the Chipmunks receiving head from their respective Chipette. A Theodorian is a sophisticated and enlightened individual, commonly taking up occupations such as surgeon and district attorney. A Theodorian is under the impression that Theodore is the chipmunk Receiving the Best Head, but they are wrong. The main difference between a Simonist and a Theodorian is generally their mental capacity. A Theodorian, fundamentally, is superior to a Simonist, the weakest link in the human chain.
Simonist: β€œSimon is getting the best head, as we all know.”
Theodorian: β€œQuite factually, you are wrong. Theodore is receiving head from a stance of LOVE, not lust my naive little gremlin.”
by September 19, 2019
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