A sex act in which two or more people stimulate themselves sexually, either with hands or toys, while on the phone with each other. This act is often practiced by those in a long distance relationship.
Any of the type of disturbing, threatening, or grossly uncomfortable phone calls which leaves the recipient of said call feeling like they were just gang raped by a room full of meth-addicted menopausal yetis.
AN EXAMPLE OF TELECOMMUTILATION
*Ring*
YOU: "Hello?"
HER: "Andy, it's Felicity."
YOU: "What's up?"
HER: "Remember you stood me up last Thursday? Remember that guy I introduced you to, the big guy, MMA fighter, Dirk Rockhard? He's my boyfriend now and he said to tell you he's going to rip your fucking spleen out through your asshole."
You: "..."
When you have to pee in a movie but don’t want to miss anything, and must do the following mental equation: will the amount I have to pee cause enough discomfort to diminish my attention capacity for the remainder of the movie to an extent which is greater than the amount of the movie I would miss by making a mad dash to the restroom.
I saw Satantango last night, wonderful film but by the 5th hour I had to start doing pee calculus.
Short-hand for the word floccinaucinihilipilification, meaning the estimation of something as valueless (encountered mainly as an example of one of the longest words in the English language).
Precedes or follows either a gratuitously disrespectful or honest remark, originated in New York City. Used in similar fashion to "no offense" or "to be honest," interchangeably.
Ya mans is wild buns, respectfully. Respectfully he's washed.
After school, The Modells on Jamaica Ave was active. Respectfully.