Shitwanker can commonly be applied to the French, sweat-heads, minge-bags and scum. The term shitwanker originated when some of the French attempted munging a 1 month old corpse, in this occurrence however, the French decided that they would stamp on the stomach of the corpse with a jar inserted into the anus of the corpse. After filling the jar with maggots, faeces/feces they capped the lid and removed the sphincter of the corpse with a rusty spoon(other instruments do not invalidate the verb). This was then placed in the jar with the waste and excrement harvested earlier.
Once the group arrived in their zero bedroom flat in Paris, they removed the excrement from the jar and molded it with their bare hands to a size that could fit in the sphincter, following this, the group egg-washed the excrement to lubricate it, inserted the excrement into the sphincter and finally baked the waste for 30 minutes at around 120 degrees C, at the end of this time they carefully removed the bake from the oven, leaving it for 2 hours to cool. At the end of this time, lubricant was rubbed onto the bake, the sphincter was dislodged from the golden-brown egg-wash crust, covered in lubricant. One of the group would eagerly move the sphincter along the bake, appearing to wank the shit.
Henceforth this action became known as Shitwanking.
Once the group arrived in their zero bedroom flat in Paris, they removed the excrement from the jar and molded it with their bare hands to a size that could fit in the sphincter, following this, the group egg-washed the excrement to lubricate it, inserted the excrement into the sphincter and finally baked the waste for 30 minutes at around 120 degrees C, at the end of this time they carefully removed the bake from the oven, leaving it for 2 hours to cool. At the end of this time, lubricant was rubbed onto the bake, the sphincter was dislodged from the golden-brown egg-wash crust, covered in lubricant. One of the group would eagerly move the sphincter along the bake, appearing to wank the shit.
Henceforth this action became known as Shitwanking.
"I bet they are eager to shitwank again, although I really would rather not have my corpse shitwanked, I would really like to become a shitwanker"
by Europe. January 28, 2015
by Intervallo March 25, 2009
by Hitokiri Neo December 22, 2008
Your such a shitwank!
by Wazzlefazzle177 March 8, 2008
by kennydeee November 20, 2011
Both a really bad mastubatory experience or a term of reference, affectionate or otherwise towards an individual.
i.e. there was good porn but just as I was about to jizz, some gay popup appeared and spoilt it.
i.e. "hey you, shitwank! Keep the fucking noise down and tell your bro I said he was a tossfuck!"
i.e. "hey you, shitwank! Keep the fucking noise down and tell your bro I said he was a tossfuck!"
by HimJip March 2, 2011