Realist masturbator Share definition Flag A person who masturbates only to women/men that are in their league. Yo dude Mike told me he only jerks off to fat chicks.Yeah cause Mike's a realist masturbator. Realist masturbator by Elmo24 October 20, 2012 0 0 Get merch Get the Realist masturbator mug. Buy Now — $32.95 See more merch