A metaphorical badge of loyalty usually referenced as an item of travel gear when visiting a good friend in a tight spot.
“I’m visiting my buddy in the Army next week but he’s stationed at a pretty wild post, you know, murders, kidnappings, war brides, that kind of thing; so, I’ll definitely be packing my Kevlar neck gaiter.”
“Jesus, where’s he stationed, Fallujah?”
“Nah, Fort Bragg.”
“Jesus, where’s he stationed, Fallujah?”
“Nah, Fort Bragg.”
by Tin Hat Kippah December 9, 2020
A military colloquial for their helmets, due to what they are made of. This can also be applied to other protective gear of the same material, but is mainly applied to helmets due to their more obvious design, and other gear also including ceramic inserts.
Privates tend to misuse their Kevlars in humorous ways, up to and including strapping them to their joints to play human shuffleboard.
"Grab your Kevlar, we have a convoy in 2 hours"
"Grab your Kevlar, we have a convoy in 2 hours"
by Kirknay February 8, 2022
by Keko y'no February 19, 2021
Hello fellow soldier care to give me a kevlar flat smack?
Why yes fellow soldier i would love to flat smack that ass with some kevlar
*proceeds to smack that sweet ass*
*gay buttsex proceeds with the soldiers ripened ass receiving some bomb ass dick*
Why yes fellow soldier i would love to flat smack that ass with some kevlar
*proceeds to smack that sweet ass*
*gay buttsex proceeds with the soldiers ripened ass receiving some bomb ass dick*
by Devin the pedophile April 27, 2017
Kevlar Vest is a term describing a conspiracy theory that is more fact than fiction, the antithesis to a Tinfoil Hat conspiracy theory which is more fiction then fact. Typically investigating a Kevlar Vest conspiracy theory is bad for one’s health, thus you would require a “Kevlar Vest”.
Paul: “All I’m saying is that Epstein didn’t kill himself!”
Sally: *Rips off face, revealing herself to be an FBI agent.*
FBI Agent: “You should have stopped digging.”
Paul: “Aww man, I knew this was a Kevlar Vest Conspiracy.”
FBI Agent: *Kills Paul, frames it as a suicide.*
Sally: *Rips off face, revealing herself to be an FBI agent.*
FBI Agent: “You should have stopped digging.”
Paul: “Aww man, I knew this was a Kevlar Vest Conspiracy.”
FBI Agent: *Kills Paul, frames it as a suicide.*
by chinsaw2727 September 30, 2022