Illinois consists of two parts: Chicago, and the black abyss beneath it.
Chicago is known all around the world for producing many things, being windy, and the mafia.
But I’m not going to tell you about Chicago, you all seem pretty well-informed of it already. I’m going to tell you about …. Central Illinois. (“What? What did she say? There’s a CENTRAL Illinois?”)
The only reason I could see anyone ever coming here is there is moderately good school systems. Never mind the rednecks, terrible weather, and nothing to do—the schools are good!
Not everyone is a redneck, that’s an exaggeration. But there are a lot of people who have very distinct red-neck qualities. And don’t let me get started on the weather. The summers are dreadfully hot and the winters are freezing. I’ve grown up here all my life, and I’m still not used to it.
But there are … some good things. We’ve discovered you can make more money if you put “Lincoln” in front of anything. Hey, we’re the “Land of Lincoln,” why not?! We have a lot of nice parks, as an example one close to me: Lincoln Memorial Gardens. Lookie there, two of the things mention rolled into one!
The cornfields I grew up next to are constantly being cut up and houses are always being built, for we have such a good school system here everyone is just flocking in. For now, it’s a relatively nice place to raise you little ones. But in another ten, twenty years it’ll be vastly overcrowded. We’ll be like a new Chicago! Oh joy!
Chicago is known all around the world for producing many things, being windy, and the mafia.
But I’m not going to tell you about Chicago, you all seem pretty well-informed of it already. I’m going to tell you about …. Central Illinois. (“What? What did she say? There’s a CENTRAL Illinois?”)
The only reason I could see anyone ever coming here is there is moderately good school systems. Never mind the rednecks, terrible weather, and nothing to do—the schools are good!
Not everyone is a redneck, that’s an exaggeration. But there are a lot of people who have very distinct red-neck qualities. And don’t let me get started on the weather. The summers are dreadfully hot and the winters are freezing. I’ve grown up here all my life, and I’m still not used to it.
But there are … some good things. We’ve discovered you can make more money if you put “Lincoln” in front of anything. Hey, we’re the “Land of Lincoln,” why not?! We have a lot of nice parks, as an example one close to me: Lincoln Memorial Gardens. Lookie there, two of the things mention rolled into one!
The cornfields I grew up next to are constantly being cut up and houses are always being built, for we have such a good school system here everyone is just flocking in. For now, it’s a relatively nice place to raise you little ones. But in another ten, twenty years it’ll be vastly overcrowded. We’ll be like a new Chicago! Oh joy!
Look at how I am, a prime example of how your children will grow up living in Central Illinois. Unless you’re rich. That’s the next neighbourhood over.
by TheSpaz September 11, 2005
A state consisting of Chicago and Southern Illinois. The true Southern Illinoisans (located south of I-64) are constantly disputing whether the S in southern should be capitalized or not.
by ~Tonya May 22, 2005
When a person from state of Illinois, cannot not have a conversation without mentioning the word Illinois, to the point where it becomes utterly annoying.
Tom: How can Jane seriously be that Illinoying?
Joe: I know right? How can Antarctica relate to that supposed "great" state?
Jane: Back in Illinois, we did this and not that.
Cutting her off, John: Seriously, you are Illinoying the crap out of me!
Joe: I know right? How can Antarctica relate to that supposed "great" state?
Jane: Back in Illinois, we did this and not that.
Cutting her off, John: Seriously, you are Illinoying the crap out of me!
by jokerville January 24, 2012
1. A State in the Midwest.
2. An amazing piece of music by the artist Sufjan Stevens. Recently Amazon.com named it the best album of 2005.
2. An amazing piece of music by the artist Sufjan Stevens. Recently Amazon.com named it the best album of 2005.
by Bob S November 17, 2005
by Truth Tree November 18, 2019
by El Hammertoe January 7, 2013
A place that would be a WHOLE lot fucking better if Chicago just became it's own state other than Chicago it's a good place and GUESS WHAT MOST OF WHAT CHICAGOAN'S CALL SOUTHERN ILLINOIS WHICH IS BELOW I-80 WE LIKE NEW YORK PIZZA TOO BITCHES in my town in EASTERN ILLINOIS with one of the best universities in the the Midwest we have 15 pizza joints and like one maybe two are Chicago pizza and were not REDNECKS we have electricity and indoor toilets to just saying if you didn't move here from Chicago to downstate we just hate you for many reasons like the like 15 governors you voted in were corrupt and the like 5 that are in prison thanks
You live in Chicago.
No i live in Charleston.
Is that part of Chicago.
No its part of Illinois.
You sure?
YES YOU RETARDED JACKASS!!!!!!!!!
No i live in Charleston.
Is that part of Chicago.
No its part of Illinois.
You sure?
YES YOU RETARDED JACKASS!!!!!!!!!
by Lordnikon97 January 23, 2012