fingernail

A sharp pointy object located at the end of a finger. (In some cases, there have been reports of the stated object appearing at the end of toes. However, this statement cannot be confirmed as there is currently no proof of the named existence.) Often very sharp, the above substance can be used as a weapon. (Said cases HAVE been reported.) If you find yourself growing these strange objects, please note that yearly trimming should be practiced for your own safety, lest you dig them into your own flesh by mistake. Usually, pain follows. However, this cannot be confirmed either, as no real cases have been reported of this strange action.

Security Guard: "I'm sorry, young lady, but I'm afraid you cannot board the plane. Please remove those uncontrollable weapons from your hands immediately before boarding."

by Grella June 6, 2005

fingernail

The number one cause of vaginal tearing resulting in bad days for both women and men.

My cooter hurts; I thought I told you to trim the fingernail on your poker finger.

by Ryan Guide August 25, 2007

fingernail file

Good utensil for use on the fingernail.

Also good for stabbing.

Used the fingernail file to stab the jail guard in the left testicle.

by larstait October 12, 2003

Fingernail Lottery

Risky game of chance, typically played by the lower classes or students, where a much-needed visit to the toilet is followed by the depressing realisation that there is a very limited amount of toilet paper at the user´s disposal.

Guy 1: "Last night, Mandy invited me round for a free manicure as part of her beautician´s course."

Guy 2: "Wow, she is so hot. How did it go?"

Guy 1: "Pretty well until it became abundantly clear that I play the Fingernail Lottery every week."

"Such was my urgent need, I locked the toilet door in great haste, lowered my britches and dropped some friends off at the pool. Only then did I note the dire lack of toilet tissue. My heart sank in the sad knowledge that I would have to play the Fingernail Lottery."
Hard Times, Charles Dickens

by Francois Fromage June 10, 2010

fingernail shrapnel

The projectile fingernail clippings that fly off on random trajectories when the nails are clipped.Most dangerous are the eye shrapnel.Most embarrassing is the shrapnel that you couldn't see where it went only to find out later from a friend at work that you have a fingernail clipping in your hair.

I now wear goggles when clipping my nails to protect my eyes from fingernail shrapnel.

by wolfbait51 May 21, 2011

fingernail fudge

the feces under you fingernail after you have had your finger up a woman's ass. Often goes unnoticed at first due to the excitement of the moment when fucking her pussy and fingering her ass simultaneously.

I washed my hands but there was still a trace of fingernail fudge from when I was with Sherry.

by Woody Thomas September 20, 2008

Fingernail crumbs

The unpleasing morsels left in the bottom of a bag of popcorn, chips, pretzels that have likely come into contact with one's fingernail.

Throw that bag of popcorn away, the only thing left is fingernail crumbs.
I wouldn't eat any chips out of that bag, Chad was using his hand to dig for chips and he likely left fingernail crumbs.

by CaptainGordon August 20, 2013