Excise
Excise by qwertyuaiaia November 1, 2014
Urban Dictionary Merch
Your favorite words on things you can wear, drink from, read, or give to a friend.
The Urban Dictionary Store sells gifts you’ll have to explain.
Related Words
Excise Police
Undercover police officers that walk around parking lots at concerts or other events looking for any minors drinking alcohol, smoking marijuana, using tobacco, or any other illegal thing you can think of. They will dress in common street attire and typically will be in small groups or spread out in the same area. Will present badge, ask age and for i.d., if you have done anything wrong they will arrest you. If you are a minor, they will usually call your parents and have them pick you up, but if they are assholes they might take you to juvenile detention. If you are an adult, jail. A very ridiculous group of people whom have nothing better to do with their lives than ruin other peoples nights.
Concert Goer #1: Yo man why didn't you meet up with us at the Dave Matthews Band concert?
Concert Goer (myself) #2: Sorry dude I got arrested in the parking lot by the Excise Police because I was smoking a cigarette and I had seven joints in my cigarette pack. I'm in deep shit!
Concert Goer #1: Dude that sucks! That's the second year in a row that's happened to you.
Concert Goer (myself) #2: Sorry dude I got arrested in the parking lot by the Excise Police because I was smoking a cigarette and I had seven joints in my cigarette pack. I'm in deep shit!
Concert Goer #1: Dude that sucks! That's the second year in a row that's happened to you.
Excise Police by MrMojoRisin_41 October 24, 2008
HM customs & excise
(n.) Her Majesty's custom and excise, who control most of British taxation, and really don't give a shit that it's too much, so shut up and pay, you working class daily star and the sun readers who bitch about the government.
HM customs & excise by Kung-Fu Jesus May 6, 2004
affair excuses
What you tell the wife when you are with your whore
- playing golf
- going for a long walk with the dogs
- at a business meeting
- going for a long lunch in the country with the best friend (one who also has a mistress)
- working late
- meeting some old boys in London
- playing golf
- going for a long walk with the dogs
- at a business meeting
- going for a long lunch in the country with the best friend (one who also has a mistress)
- working late
- meeting some old boys in London
Girlfriend : i didn't see you on Thursday night. can we hook up at the weekend
Adulterer : Sure. I can get away. i'll just give the wife one of my affair excuses
Adulterer : Sure. I can get away. i'll just give the wife one of my affair excuses
affair excuses by farnham philanderer January 2, 2017
Excuser moi
Excuser moi by alex-square February 14, 2023
Well excuse me princess!
Well excuse me princess! by CurlyHayami September 9, 2004
More from Urban Dictionary
Bunhead
A girl who does ballet and only talks about ballet. Her schedule is filled with dance classes which does not allow her to do any other activity.
trucker's tan
A sunburn or suntan focused on the left arm. It is caused by the left side of the body being the only half that gets exposed to sunlight while driving. Presumably, it would be located on the right side of the body in countries where they drive on the left side of the road.
trucker's tan by population361 May 30, 2006
Word of the Day on October 5, 2026
kidulting
Every time I walk into the toy aisle, I catch myself kidulting over the latest action figures and LEGO sets!
kidulting by Emotional Cruiser October 12, 2025
Word of the Day on October 4, 2026
Boffin
British slang for a scientist or technical expert, esp . when the speaker is not certain of the expert’s specific field of study. Not necessarily derogatory, but typically used by persons without a technical background. In the US, the equivalent would be “egghead”, “squint”, or “geek.”
Origin of the word is unknown. Started sometime in World War 2. Given the typical evolution of British slang, could easily have started because what these experts did was confusing or “baffling” to the common person.
Origin of the word is unknown. Started sometime in World War 2. Given the typical evolution of British slang, could easily have started because what these experts did was confusing or “baffling” to the common person.
Pee Calculus
When you have to pee in a movie but don’t want to miss anything, and must do the following mental equation: will the amount I have to pee cause enough discomfort to diminish my attention capacity for the remainder of the movie to an extent which is greater than the amount of the movie I would miss by making a mad dash to the restroom.
Pee Calculus by anorlondo October 1, 2026
Word of the Day on October 2, 2026