Clapham 

Chronic masturbator.

Mike sure is a clapham

Clapham by Not mike69 December 30, 2012

clapham face lift

noun.when a hairband or ponytail is worn that pulls back tightly against the scalp creating the illusion of a face lift.popular in trailer parks and council estates.

e.g Her head looks like she`s had a clapham face lift!

clapham face lift by steve finning June 20, 2006

Clapham Common 

Loud and very public anal sex on Clapham Common best done after closing time.

Hey, look at Mikey - he is still wearing the tell tale signs of his Clapham Common last night

Clapham Common by clapham lover October 18, 2008

Clapham Junction 

Quite possibly the centrel hub of the universe.

If you get lost anywhere in south west London just find Clapham Junction and you can get home again

Clapham Junction by Last Chancer October 28, 2006

Clapham bow tie 

Wearing a rear bicycle light in the same manner as one would wear a bow-tie. Light is generally attached using a clip to the collar. Light is switched on/off as desired. Must be flashing when on.

'I say Jenkins, that chap is sporting a rather fine clapham bow tie, what?'

'Eeey blud, set me your clapham bow tie. Also your phone.'

Clapham bow tie by Dr. Lady Lolbert Monkeybush March 19, 2009

clapham gay 

A gay man who lives in or around Clapham (Tooting, Balham, Battersea, Wandsworth) and affects of superiority around shared interests including clubbing, physical appearance, gymming and wealth.

"He'd be hot if he wasn't such a clapham gay"

clapham gay by LuckOfTheDraw March 24, 2023

Clapham Glove 

(noun)

A Clapham Glove is often used to defend the male from notorious Sexually Transmitted Diseases often caught in Clapham following a Hinge or Tinder date. These diseases can include; Relationships, Second Dates and Clap.

The male should always be equipped with their own "Clapham Glove"

"Oh no, Jack is going on a Hinge date tonight, I hope he has packed an extra Clapham Glove"

Clapham Glove by ClaphamGloveSS December 13, 2020