A person who deliberately causes the breakup in someone's relationship so they can have a go at the other person's partner. Usually they do it to a a close friend which makes them even worse.
Someone who offers alternative foods, with the aim of obscuring the real object of their attention - the cake. This selfish creature is not above sneaking back to the fridge once the threat of other would-be eaters has passed, devouring the cake in whole. She will deny her cake lust at all costs, but step away from her coveted jewel for even a moment and you won't see it again.
You have been invited to a birthday party and the host informs you this is a non-traditional celebration - beware, a cake taker is in your midst.
To be an extreme or special instance, as if it wins a cake for being so extreme or special. Usually used in the form "I have seen/heard a lot of (variable), but (this) takes the cake." A common, but aging phrase in Scandinavian languages.
A: Did you see that girl?
B: Yeah. I've seen a lot of girls in my life, but she takes the cake.
A: I'd let her take the cake any day.
B: You're an idiot.
While our lifespan is the number of years we will live, our healthspan is the number of healthy years we will have and our sexspan is is the number of years we will continue to be healthy enough to continue having an active sex life.
A lighthearted reaction upon receiving disappointing news of some sort. Usually something that isn't a particularly a big deal, esp. when it primarily affects someone else - sort of a mild schadenfreude. Sometimes doubled or tripled, and possibly said in a sing-songy voice for added comedic effect to imitate a muted trumpet, which is how the meme originated.