a person who watches out for you when trying new and different drugs; usually thee experienced person or the person with less intrest in the drug; person who keeps you outta trouble
Bob- "Dude, I wanna shroom. Wanna be my caretaker?"
A person who deliberately causes the breakup in someone's relationship so they can have a go at the other person's partner. Usually they do it to a a close friend which makes them even worse.
While our lifespan is the number of years we will live, our healthspan is the number of healthy years we will have and our sexspan is is the number of years we will continue to be healthy enough to continue having an active sex life.
A lighthearted reaction upon receiving disappointing news of some sort. Usually something that isn't a particularly a big deal, esp. when it primarily affects someone else - sort of a mild schadenfreude. Sometimes doubled or tripled, and possibly said in a sing-songy voice for added comedic effect to imitate a muted trumpet, which is how the meme originated.