The "Bad Uncle" is the uncle that the kids love - but the parents maybe not so much. He's a good guy and all, but to your parents he knows way too much about the shady side of life. What the kids love and the parents hate is that he's only too happy to share his knowledge and stories with those who ask and he's always willing to help you out of trouble. This is most likely because he inspired you to get into this particular trouble and you because you didn't listen - you did it wrong.

He's the one that won't bootleg for the kids, but he'll let them know how to get it without him. He teaches them how to pick up girls, hang out in strip clubs without looking like a douche and when you need to talk about stuff that you can't go to Daddy with - you go to the Bad Uncle.

Bad Uncle is also the guy who you need to worry about when it comes to his girls. The girls Daddy might talk tough and all, but the Bad Uncle will fuck you up if you hurt his niece.
Nephew: Uncle Jezza, me and some friends just got picked up by the cops for drinking - what do I do?

Bad Uncle: Wait there don't say anything and I'll be there in 10 minutes. Don't call your Dad.

Niece: Oh Uncle... I met this great guy last night he's so nice...

Bad Uncle: Uh huh........ Yeah I'm going to need to meet him. Did he try anything?

Niece: No of course not.... Like I said - he's niiiccccee.

Bad Uncle: I've told you since you were 5 minutes old - Never trust the nice ones cause you don't know what you're getting. I'd rather you meet a prick because then I know what I'm dealing with.

If you want to see him again - I'm going to meet him first.

Niece: But Uncle...

Bad Uncle: But nothing... and if he hurts you they'll just never find the body
by Bad Uncle May 13, 2011
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Your creepy uncle that always seems to want a grope-hug and tells you to sit on his lap. The one everybody feels awkward around ever since he took little Susie under the stairs at last year's family reunion.
Man, Mike seems like a real Uncle Bad Touch. He's pretty creepy.
by Misha Pilsudski December 27, 2010
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A person who has acted upon an individual, who is unaware of the means of the situation, with a dirty sexual intension.
"Uncle Bad Touch, Why is your lap So Lumpy?"
by UncleBadTouch April 17, 2006
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A creepy tree farmer who thinks he is a doctor and advertises free rectal exams out of his van
I just got back from my rectal exam with your uncle bad touch
by camping buddy June 01, 2017
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Creepy person that appears to be a child moletster.
While I was watching the debates I realized that John McCain lurked around the stage like your creepy uncle bad touch.
by Wannawatcho October 15, 2008
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