When the storm is coming in, dock your boat anywhere you can. Also, When the bar is closing and all of the good looking girls are leaving, settle with any fat/ugly one.
Bartender: Last call.

Guy: I'll take 1 and a bottom shelf long island ice tea for Bluto.

Bartender: Really?!

Guy: Hey, any port in the storm
by experienced fuck up February 17, 2012
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Sailor Dialect meaning, essentially: when you're in trouble, any way out is a good way out.
Y'see, back when people sailed the seven seas with reckless abandon, a crew was more likely to find the nearest port than to risk ship and crew in a life-threatening storm. This phrase is probably most applicable to the pirate-sorts, as this phrase suggests that anything is better than getting screwed, and pirates liked that sort of shady-around-the-edges shiznit.
(thunder, lightening.)
Pirate #1: 'Tis cap'n's orders ter drop anchor at the nearest port!
Pirate #2: Aye, any port in the storm, sez i.

Math Student #1: Dude, I may have cheated on that math test, but I stayed up all night watching reruns of Cheers! What else was I supposed to do?
Math Student #2: Hey, any port in the storm.
by Simon Floyd November 28, 2003
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It's a sort of motto, used in jest or as an insult about another. It means to accept less than your desires or to lower your standards under pressure.
When closing time approached, Dan started hitting on some old bat. "Any port in a storm", muttered the bartender to the waitress.
by ajf November 26, 2003
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1. A saying indicating that no choice offers more advantage in certain situations where time is the most important factor to consider in making a decision.
1: Damn, I am so horny I would lay that fat bag in the corner.
2: Yah well, any port in a storm.
by pootie tang November 26, 2003
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When you fuck a girl just because its take it or leave.

Also a scene band from Garner which serves as a portable Mecca for the growing Emo population. They are extremely metal-core, AKA terrible.
Tom "Dude I had to man, she was an any port in a storm situation."
Fred "Still, why? I'd rather listen to APIAS."
Tom "Not much better dude."
by www.ushistory.com March 20, 2009
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After a long period without sexual contact, a male's willingness to have sex with anything that moves (or doesn't).
After a week in prison, I was ready to dock my boat in any port in a storm.
by vagsurfer March 18, 2009
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