sneeze the weasel

To masturbate; the weasel is the dick being sneezed.

"Bro, why are you so late for the meeting?"
"Ah, sorry, I got really horny and had to sneeze the weasel."

by RegaTheChad June 16, 2021

Smacking the weasel

A hand job. Mastubation. Etc.

1: Did you do the homework last night?

2: No, I was too busy smacking the weasel.

1: Wtf?

by qsuedenimp November 24, 2010

skeevy weasel

The creepy dude on the train who just leers at you.

"Did you see that skeevy weasel on the ride to chinatown?"

"I hope some day to grow up to be a skeevy weasel and creep girls out on the bus all day."

by hsigor August 20, 2007

bleeding the weasel

To have anal sex and tear through a matted patch of anal hair, then plowing said ass until bleeding occurs.

Man I was totally bleeding the weasel with Lisa last night.

by Emerica ann August 25, 2014

Sneaky Weasel

Eat nothing but coffee beans and nuts for a day with out chewing and take a shit on your partners chest. Gather the seeds and put on a pot.

Don’t forget to get some coffee creamer and sugar for the sneaky weasel tonight. Hope decaf is alright tonight. I can’t stay up late”

by Mr.Gofukurself January 25, 2019

Lady Weasel

A lady's weasel (vagina)

'Her lady weasel's out again.'

by ladyweasel July 21, 2013

Shit weasel

Someone who kisses up to People in hopes of getting special treatment is referred to as a shit weasel. Literally, a shit weasel rims with such enthusiasm that, well lets just say some things are best not said... Basically calling someone a shit weasel is like calling them an ass kisser, brown noser, etcetera, but moreso.

Damn that whore was a fucking shit weasel I feel so lucky to have knocked her up!

by Itssatjayuga@gmail June 11, 2019