Wank in the Bush

When you have an awkward boner and cannot keep it in your pants any longer and there isn't a bathroom near by, so you whip it out and pretend you're taking a piss but secretly wank in the bush.

Dan: "Liam mate are you having a wank in the bush?"
Liam: "Na mate just taking a piss, being holding it in all day!"

by professor oi oi July 29, 2016

Alpha Wank

When a male has a wank staring at himself in the mirror, usually accompanied with positive remarks "you're a fuckin good looking bastard"
One would engage in such activities to build confidence within themselves as an alpha and also in the bedroom.

Bro I had the best alpha wank last night, I feel real alpha today from it

by M3n1s January 11, 2022

Revision Wank

When you're revising surface anatomy and you see boobs which causes you to go on porn and wank.

"I had to revise last night but it just led to a revision wank"

by superdude3435 May 11, 2010

Stank wank

The act of masturbating while taking a dump.

Dude, I tried so hard to get my old lady to give me a blumpkin. She wouldn't go for it so I had to settle for a stank wank.

by Chykaty chyna December 3, 2016

Wank Throne

An office/gaming chair that's also used for masturbation, particularly if the chair is worn out or in poor condition.

I walked in on Steve sitting on his wank throne, hastily stuffing his boner into his draws with hentai on his Chromebook screen. DESGUSTANG!

by JEFF_BENZOS August 29, 2019

Ass Wank

When you don't have a penis so you masturbate your anus

Friend 1: Man, I was so horny last night but I don't have a dick :(
Friend 2: You should try ass wanking, it's so good

by Superbankai April 26, 2016

Hank Wank

Rubbing one out with and into a handkerchief aka hanky to avoid the mess and to add little friction to enhance the experience.

I do a hank wank each night before bed so I can go right to sleep. But I need to wash my hanky. That thing is getting awful stiff and crusty.

by Eaton Holgoode June 11, 2018