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Monkey Fuckball

When 2 or more people are trying to accomplish a task and failing spectacularly due to sheer incompetence. aka “two monkeys trying to fuck a football,”.
Those two guys putting that swingset together look like they are playing a game of monkey fuckball.
by Bobobzilla July 12, 2021
mugGet the Monkey Fuckballmug.

Monkey's Blowjob

You hang upside down using your legs on a bar while your partner has their dick ready to be sucked. You grab his waist to force his dick into your upside down mouth. Staying upside down for long isn't a good idea so make sure you take breaks every time after he cums. This probably improves leg strength?
Bob: Oh hey dude my GF just gave me a Monkey's Blowjob!
Walter: Damn her legs must be pretty strong
Bob: Hell yeah they are
Walter: Thigh guy.
by SomeInternetDweeb May 8, 2023
mugGet the Monkey's Blowjobmug.

Merge Monkey

A person who habitually uses the median turn-lane to illegally merge with traffic after a left turn, especially when they could have legally and safely turned into the proper traffic lane.
I was turning into the subdivision and a Merge Monkey almost killed me! I had to swerve to prevent a head-on collision!
by pseudoraptor February 18, 2010
mugGet the Merge Monkeymug.

Monkey Brownsock

Similar to a brownsock, but with the addition of a monkey punch to help in the complicated process. As you pinksock your lover, you punch her in the back of the head to cause a disruption in her concentration, resulting in a loss of bowel control and the same ultimate outcome as the brownsock.
She wanted to try a brownsock but she was having trouble shitting during it, so I gave her a monkey brownsock instead!
by zagen December 7, 2009
mugGet the Monkey Brownsockmug.

monkey flowers

slang term for marijuana.Usually smoked in a blunt or pipe.
by Kyle Karzmarczyk May 23, 2006
mugGet the monkey flowersmug.

Monkey Sandwich

When you put both your fist into someone’s asshole and twist
Guy1: shut up your mom is gay
Guy2: fuck you I’ll give you a monkey Sandwich
by HornetToast February 11, 2021
mugGet the Monkey Sandwichmug.

Freeze the Monkey

Verb | To have sex with a Snowman.

(Original definition by a YouTuber named "CaptainSauce")
"Hey Amy, did you hear that Kevin said he would Freeze the Monkey last night?"
"Yeah, Emma! Kevin is such an idiot sometimes!"
by RandomMoron February 22, 2020
mugGet the Freeze the Monkeymug.

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