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Murphy's Law of "Junk"

"You can hold onto something for decades, and neither you nor anyone else will ever have a use for it, but then just as soon as you throw it out, either you will suddenly need it for something, or --- even more 'painful' --- **someone else** will come to you and humbly ask, 'Do you happen to have an extra ___?'" Rrrrrggggghhhhh----!!!
I'd had a couple of old 55-gallon oil-drums stashed in da garage for da past thirty years --- my grampa had given 'em to me when he and Gram were downsizing to move into an assisted-living apartment --- and they'd just sat there and gathered dust in da corner all that time. But then just two days --- TWO STINKIN' DAYS!! --- after I'd sent 'em to da crusher for recycling, a low-income neighbor dropped by and asked me if he could have them to use as burn-barrels --- guess dat was a classic case of Murphy's Law of "Junk" at work!!
by QuacksO July 24, 2018
mugGet the Murphy's Law of "Junk"mug.

Junk Sleep

Poor quality sleep that makes you feel more tired than well-rested.
"Keep calling Kevin, Keith? That's Junk Sleep."
by Matty Firm May 31, 2022
mugGet the Junk Sleepmug.

Shake your junk

Alternate phrase for male stripping. Essentially describes the nude dancing and hip thrusts guys sometimes do for pathetic amounts of money. Often used to confront or belittle guys, jokingly or otherwise, about being strippers.
"You can't accuse me of having a bad job while you just shake your junk for 5 dollars an hour."

Colin: "Does Jake have a job?"
Ben: "Yeah. He's a stripper."
Jake: "What? No I'm not!"
Ben: "Dont lie, Jake. We all know you shake your junk in that place on Preston road."
by Elsis May 16, 2016
mugGet the Shake your junkmug.

"junk" filter abuse

Where you falsely tag one or more legitimate e-mails as "spam" merely because you'd prefer not to read the messages due to their containing unwelcome content, such as reminding you that you owe money, are responsible for performing certain arduous/unpleasant tasks, etc.
Practicing "junk" filter abuse may indeed prevent unwelcome e-mails from showing up in your inbox, but it merely "delays the inevitable"... the chickens are still gonna come home to roost eventually (i.e., your creditors and/or da cops are still gonna come knocking on your door in da end), but by then they will be "cackling mad" at your selfish/offhanded ignoring of them and their genuine issues with you, and so they will likely scatter poop and loose feathers all over you (i.e., deal with you a lot more harshly) when they finally arrive on your doorstep, rather than just placidly settling down in their stalls for the night, the way they probably would have if you had simply addressed their concerns in a timely/appropriate manner in da first place!
by QuacksO October 28, 2018
mugGet the "junk" filter abusemug.

Jolly Junk January

The reward for people who complete NNN but don't choose to suffer Destroy Dick December. Basically you agree to take up healthy habits of jacking off. Rulesets vary but generally the rule is everything in moderation, and when you whack it, whack it with quality and enjoy it.
Person 1: "Dude DDD was so painful. I can't believe I did that after NNN."

Person 2: "Yeah. That's why I chose to take my reward and do Jolly Junk January instead. Healthy masturbation habits make life a lot more sunny."

Person 1: "Maybe I should try it."
by JJJSage November 11, 2020
mugGet the Jolly Junk Januarymug.

Junked out

Dude I am so junked out right now
by B kangaroo July 5, 2017
mugGet the Junked outmug.

Junk Stuffers

Good old John needed a giant pair of junk stuffers to wear because he was hung like a horse
by Nerdboy1982! May 21, 2020
mugGet the Junk Stuffersmug.

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