by staples are tasty July 21, 2021
I’m probably not even gonna have a husband so I can Spend $12,000 on Flex Tape and condoms and nobody will be able to yell at me for it
by Miff_ May 19, 2018
An insult that can be used as an alternative to "fuck me" or "fuck me sideways" and can avoid actions that look like fucking someone sideways. Also an insult that can be used against others because they are simply an ass or they are stupid, and as such, deserve really painful sex.
-Why the hell did you yell your ex's name when you had sex with your girl?
-Fuck me sideways with a sandpaper condom.
-Dude, where the hell are you?
-I'm stuck behind this old fart.
-Go fuck him sideways with a sandpaper condom, it's your damn fault you woke up late.
-Fuck me sideways with a sandpaper condom.
-Dude, where the hell are you?
-I'm stuck behind this old fart.
-Go fuck him sideways with a sandpaper condom, it's your damn fault you woke up late.
by gofuckaduck90 June 15, 2011
The sole condom, possibly past it's use-by date that is stored in the wallet of the hopelessly single.
That bitch stole my wallet! I mean seriously, what's she going to do with my expired Driver's License and who-am-I-kidding? condom
by DJNrrd May 21, 2007
a very good condom that feels as if there is nothing there while having anal or vaginal sex with your B@b!
"hold on baby i'll be right back, i have to go get my TROJAN HER PLEASURE LUBRICATED CONDOM before we have hard rough sex"
by pusssssyluvvver April 14, 2010
Father: "When you go skydiving, don't forget to use your parachute."
Teen son: "Thanks dad...and remember to never use a condom more than once."
Teen son: "Thanks dad...and remember to never use a condom more than once."
by yes juanito yes March 29, 2015
When procuring an African condom, one must meet with an Egyptian, who makes all genders try his foreskin for free. This repulsive act is only followed by the Egyptian taxi driver holding their belongings for ransom.
by ecaleohs June 03, 2023