Bed Written

When an assignment is done in the comfort of your own bed due to lack of willpower to stand or generally move. Typically horrendous quality work with drool stains adorning it.

The teacher deduced the assignment must have been bed written due to the saliva puddle that had dried on it and the delusional paranoid ramblings it contained.

by Kbrix October 23, 2014

Helicopter Bed

After a big night out when you lie down, be it in your bed or on the pavement, the sensation of spinning round like a helicopters rotors

'Oh my God, I'd such bad helicopter bed last night I thought I'd take off'

by lolopops March 25, 2009

Bed dive

When you're so tired from a long day that you stand in front of you bed and do a stage dive-like fall onto it; it's usually immediately followed by passing out in the position you landed in.

John: Dude, why didn't you text me back last night?

Pete: Sorry bro, I blacked out after a bed dive at 10 last night.

by xSing4Lifexx October 25, 2010

Kay's bed

A once clean turned nasty ass bed that everyone loves to have wild, kinky sex on.

Kay's bed is so nasty by now! I can only imagine what that thing has been through! That thing is PUTRID.

EEWWWWW HOW DOES KAY SLEEP AT NIGHT?!?!

by sodium!! December 12, 2019

rockstar the bed

when you are so wiped on beer and jagermesiter that you crash out on the bed and are so smashed you piss the bed while shitting yourself and being sick, in the style of so many rock stars of the past...

Mr A: dude that was an epic 18 hour sesh I was totally wiped...
Mr B: yer man, what was the story with all that Jager? I ended up rock-starring the bed...
Mr A: no way - that's messy dude, cant believe you would rockstar the bed.

by reckless-abandon September 13, 2011

bed bugs

it's the feeling that you get at night when you have bugs crawling inside your ear to lay eggs in your brain. fun eh?

for example the other day i was sleeping in a dismle cave out in the forest. i wake to feel a weird itching in my ear and a spider comes out. so i beat the shit out of it and piss on it's remains. after a few weeks i was acting stupider than usual so to the doctor i went. he said i had baby spider eggs in my brain and were going to come out of my ear in a few days. a few days later...they finally came and it was odd. the spiders had my looks so i could tell i was the father, but at the end i was used and left by another women. :(

by DICK BLANCO March 2, 2004

bed arrest

Method of detaining people by smashing their door down in the middle of night, piling upstairs and rudely waking them up by screaming/bright lights: they are then led away in handcuffs (if lucky, some victims are simply shot in bed.) Employed by British police forces.

'What the hell happened to your house?'
'I was bed arrested last night, but they actually wanted the guy next door'

by ru August 10, 2004