poop scotch

a word that caters to anything you want it to be. Usually could be interpreted as "that's nonsense". Often spelled as two words--poopscotch.

1 "Final exams are poop scotch"
2. "wow, your acting like poop scotch right now.."
3. Pooper McGavin is a great golfer, but right now he is playing like poop scotch"

by samstown1 May 9, 2010

Pork Scotch Barbecue

A barbecue arranged by a boring old twat. No one turns up except his ugly girlfriend. They eat garlic bread at a plastic table, then proceed to drink gin and tonic until they're almost comatose. At which point the boring fat twat plays crap music very loud and dances like a spack. No Pork Scotch Barbecue is complete without the tedious "host" donning a leather cowboy hat, imagining he's a 5 foot 4 Clint Eastwood.

Flonkule: Is The Porky Scotcher at work today?

Mickus: No its not and the Sun's out so you know what that means don't you?

Flonkule: Bollocks! Another Pork Scotch Barbecue!

by Lumpbag May 24, 2009

Pork Scotch 2

Abreviated to PS2. A second man that has a Pork Scotch but is in complete contrast to the original Pork Scotch. He is actually a really nice bloke that you can relate to and be friends with. Pork Scotch is a boring, fat old security guard that believes he is supreme enough place a cone where he parks his shitty old van with an odd number of windows. PS2 also has a white van with normal van windows that is much cleaner than Pork Scoth's. He will join Pork Scotch at his several barbeques and has a son we call PSP. Pork Scotch 2's real name is Jim. The 2 Pork Scotch's rooms are right next to each other in the same flats building. They each wear different hats, Pork Scotch has a gay buffalo hat and Pork Scotch 2 has a cap.

Me: A up Jim. What are you gonna do today?

Pork Scotch 2: I'm gonna go with Ant and my Mum to town and watch TV with them, mate.

Me: Ok, what about you Harry?

Pork Scotch: I'm gonna go to the pub to watch Arsenal lose and then eat some garlic bread with Goofy Granny.

by Ednatoast Jeeganflipperwick May 28, 2009

scotch

A lovely brown whisky drink from Scotland. Must be distilled to certain standards to be called Scotch. Also certain other things from Scotland are called Scotch (Scotch pies, etc). It's spelt WHISKY not WHISKEY. Irish and American whiskey is spelt WHISKEY whereas Scotch and Canadian whisky is spelt WHISKY. Scotch as a term to refer to people from Scotland is too old school and many Scots find it offensive.

Me and my boy Johhnie Mac drank a bottle of scotch after a night at the bar and were rightly drunk.

"Scotch, scotch, scotch, I love scotch." Ron Burgundy

by A Scottish drinker. (One of millions) April 19, 2005

Scootchy

A unit of measurement when the actual amount is not known. Usually used with smaller measurements.

Put in a scootchy of baking soda.
Could you move over just a scootchy?

by SnortyG November 4, 2009

Pork Scotch walk

The slowest walking speed possible. Only fat old security guards with short stumpy legs can achieve this incredibly slow rate of movement. Given a headwind and a hangover the Pork Scotch walk can compete with continental drift for lack of swiftness.

Is that fat guy sleeping on his feet?

No he's on his way to work. He's so old and flabby he can't go any faster than a Pork Scotch walk.

by by kenny spoffo-grumpbeetle August 16, 2009

Scotching

What Pork Scotch does all day long and never gets bored doing it. This detestable activity includes wearing silly shorts you've no right to wear when you're well into your 60s, rattling bunches of keys because it makes you feel important, going out with ugly goofy old women, driving a ridiculous half-car, wearing snot-yellow coats because you're terrified of a drop of rain, listening to gay South African music and most importantly having a barbecue at least once a day in the Summer.

What's Pork Scotch up to today?

Surprisingly enough he's doing some Scotching.

Doesn't he ever get bored of it?

Nope. The tedious old twat has nothing better to do.

by flappy dickwad August 20, 2009