Jalapeno Handy

When a person slathers their hands with jalapeno and gives you a hand job. Usually a last resort after a person loses sensation in their penis as they age.

After 5 hours of brutal sex, she had to give him a jalapeno handy to get him to go home.

by Kattyblaque September 5, 2021

figtree and jalapeno

2 people who are in love and they can't not be in love because they are stuck together

figtree and jalapeno love eacgother so much

by asdfghjasdfghjasdfvbnm November 14, 2023

jalapeno blow job

this happens when your date eats jalapenos then performs oral sex on you. the capsaicin from the peppers is absorbed by the phallic skin, and enters the urethra causing unpleasant burning sensation.

the heat from the jalapeno pepper ignited Jasmine's sexual desire to the point her mouth salivated for boner. After receiving a jalapeno blow job from Jasmine, Darryls penis burned... like California wild fire.

by MC Busta September 5, 2019

Jalapeno Popper

To eat a Jalapeno or Ghost pepper and leave one in your mouth while you perform Oral sex on someone. See who pops up and taps out first

I performed a Jalapeno Popper on my dude last night and he said his stuff still feels like its on fire

by moochzigg March 11, 2020

Mongolian Jalapeno Hot-Knocker

The time period just before prarie dogging when you first feel a poop coming on. Particularly after having Hu-Hot Mongolian with a boat load of Jalapenos.

on the phone "Hey Jim, I gotta let you go; I got a Mongolian Jalapeno Hot-knocker"

by Hurts 2 Poop May 15, 2019

Jalapeno Bull Frog

When you fuck a Tijuana hooker in the ass and inadvertently end up with a jalapeno seed in your pee hole leading to an infection which makes your dick look like a swollen, angry bull frog.

Dude, about a week after our trip to Mexico my dick swelled up so big!!! I went to the doctor and he found a pepper seed in my pee hole. That slut gave me a jalapeno bull frog

by anonymous January 4, 2024

Jalapeno Enema

1. An alternate way of saying "pain in my ass".
2. A devious method of torture.
The name can be substituted in either case with hotter or weaker peppers to further articulate the intensity.

1. "This whole day has been one big Jalapeno Enema."
2. "I was kidnapped in Mexico and the cartels gave me a Jalapeno Enema while my family tried to come up with the ransom payment."

by Eleven Tails February 21, 2020