1. Thou shalt not date friends of friends
2. Thou shalt not ask someone out over the internet, unless it is absolutely necessary
3. Thou shalt not break up with thy partner over the phone or internet, in any case.
4. Thou shalt not make plans for the future, unless thou plans to fulfill them
5. Thou shalt not send mixed messages and signals
6. Thou shalt not cheat on thy partner.
7. Thou shall reject activities involving a name as an adjective
8. Thou shalt not use fecal matter in romantic ways
9. Thou shall be a dick for up to 6 hours after a break up. after this time, thou shalt not hold grudges.
10. Thou shall change the lingus, if thou is unsatisfied
2. Thou shalt not ask someone out over the internet, unless it is absolutely necessary
3. Thou shalt not break up with thy partner over the phone or internet, in any case.
4. Thou shalt not make plans for the future, unless thou plans to fulfill them
5. Thou shalt not send mixed messages and signals
6. Thou shalt not cheat on thy partner.
7. Thou shall reject activities involving a name as an adjective
8. Thou shalt not use fecal matter in romantic ways
9. Thou shall be a dick for up to 6 hours after a break up. after this time, thou shalt not hold grudges.
10. Thou shall change the lingus, if thou is unsatisfied
Translation of the Ten Commandments of Dating
1. dont date your friend's friends. it gets awkward
2. its pretty tactless and impersonal
3. Really? a break up shouldnt be sprung on someone in an indirect way
4. Dont give false hope, it's unappreciated
5. Mislead people become confused people. confused people become ANGRY people.
6. infidelity is a dick move
7. (ie. cleveland steamer) DONT DO IT
8. poo and intimacy. its just wrong. back off fecalphiliacs.
9. get all the emotions out, move on. no holds barred.
10. Anna, Donna, Connor. the three lingus friends. figure it out, choose one.
1. dont date your friend's friends. it gets awkward
2. its pretty tactless and impersonal
3. Really? a break up shouldnt be sprung on someone in an indirect way
4. Dont give false hope, it's unappreciated
5. Mislead people become confused people. confused people become ANGRY people.
6. infidelity is a dick move
7. (ie. cleveland steamer) DONT DO IT
8. poo and intimacy. its just wrong. back off fecalphiliacs.
9. get all the emotions out, move on. no holds barred.
10. Anna, Donna, Connor. the three lingus friends. figure it out, choose one.
by Greengiant 894 April 30, 2010
Get the Ten Commandments of Dating mug.The commandment that a ganster follow while he lives. They say there are 10 commandments that change in writing, but not meaning.
by IIsword April 7, 2010
Get the Ghetto Commandment mug.Commitment: Ones mental fixation on accomplishing a task or a goal. My level of commitment is only limited by my vision of the income produced by the outcome. If the process is too difficult the outcome may be sufficiently larger than the potential income and therefore my commitment may suck.
by yodotcom March 20, 2011
Get the Commitment mug.Commitment – this word, used in the context of an emotional relationship between a couple, in this case heterosexual, used to mean a man and woman professing undying L-O-V-E (spelled out so that the people who don’t recognise this word can look it up and know it’s not really a dirty 4-letter swear word, but some may think otherwise) between themselves and swearing that no man or woman would put asunder the connection between the two. (Translation - the man would not fuck around with another woman/women). This Love usually transpired in the bond of matrimony, but gradually has been accepted in a more casual and non-permanent relationship (which has actually caused the meaning of the word “Commitment” to be diluted and used very loosely but gimme a minute… I’m getting to that).
Currently, the word Commitment (also the word L_O_V_E , a word that some men have even been known to self-strangulate in an attempt to say i.e., lying to get laid for example) has absolutely no relevance to the male species. He may have verbally stated commitment to a woman long term and may have even said out-loud the L-O-V-E word, indeed they may even be cohabiting and sharing the ownership of property. Some very very strange males have even been known to marry a woman (this is very rare nowadays).
Even more strange is that the woman thinks that the circumstances mentioned above (marriage, cohabitation, and verbal statement, usually when drunk) makes it a cheat-proof certainty that her man will not go astray!
Well the truth is that while denial may be an emotional in-built survival mechanism, it does not hide the truth. (Please note that denial sometimes is mistaken for sheer stupidity and vice versa). Men have sex on a plate these days and a woman can do all that “Chef in the Kitchen, Whore in the Bedroom stuff, Toilet Scrubber in the Bathroom, Non-Controller of the TV Remote in the Lounge/Den (mostly it’s the Whore one), but you can betcha bootlicious hottie butt that there will be endless more tasty tempting lapdancetastic tartlettes awaitin to please your man in the vain hope that she/they will be able to steal him away and keep him from cheating on …..and so the cycle begins again ….ad infinitum ad nauseum as above.
Of course, men it has to reluctantly be said, are not stupid all of the time and they have realised that they don’t have to pretend to bounce from one easy free ho to the other any longer. They just keep the one at home who cooks and cleans for him, possibly still fucks him, and he looks for an endless supply of sluts by staying up late “working”, (fucking duh – there’s that fine line between denial and stupidity again) on the internet. This is done either by using adult chat rooms (this is quite a labor-intensive way of finding extracurricular Christian Aguilera dirrrrty sex) and a lot of men give up on this method, finally giving in to the more tried and tested, sure bet, good old fashioned method of paying a hooker. The internet is also a way of feeding his constant craving for penis stimulation i.e. porn and lots of it. Oh yes, porn is Soooo great for relationships!
To summarise: Commitment is a dinosaur word that has no meaning to anything whatsoever as relates to men and their view of women. However, a man will commit to love, honouring his car , no problem. (See other dinosaur words such as “Emotion”, “Feelings”, and “L_O_V_E”. Maybe you could play a game and find similar dinosaur words too! Have fun!
Currently, the word Commitment (also the word L_O_V_E , a word that some men have even been known to self-strangulate in an attempt to say i.e., lying to get laid for example) has absolutely no relevance to the male species. He may have verbally stated commitment to a woman long term and may have even said out-loud the L-O-V-E word, indeed they may even be cohabiting and sharing the ownership of property. Some very very strange males have even been known to marry a woman (this is very rare nowadays).
Even more strange is that the woman thinks that the circumstances mentioned above (marriage, cohabitation, and verbal statement, usually when drunk) makes it a cheat-proof certainty that her man will not go astray!
Well the truth is that while denial may be an emotional in-built survival mechanism, it does not hide the truth. (Please note that denial sometimes is mistaken for sheer stupidity and vice versa). Men have sex on a plate these days and a woman can do all that “Chef in the Kitchen, Whore in the Bedroom stuff, Toilet Scrubber in the Bathroom, Non-Controller of the TV Remote in the Lounge/Den (mostly it’s the Whore one), but you can betcha bootlicious hottie butt that there will be endless more tasty tempting lapdancetastic tartlettes awaitin to please your man in the vain hope that she/they will be able to steal him away and keep him from cheating on …..and so the cycle begins again ….ad infinitum ad nauseum as above.
Of course, men it has to reluctantly be said, are not stupid all of the time and they have realised that they don’t have to pretend to bounce from one easy free ho to the other any longer. They just keep the one at home who cooks and cleans for him, possibly still fucks him, and he looks for an endless supply of sluts by staying up late “working”, (fucking duh – there’s that fine line between denial and stupidity again) on the internet. This is done either by using adult chat rooms (this is quite a labor-intensive way of finding extracurricular Christian Aguilera dirrrrty sex) and a lot of men give up on this method, finally giving in to the more tried and tested, sure bet, good old fashioned method of paying a hooker. The internet is also a way of feeding his constant craving for penis stimulation i.e. porn and lots of it. Oh yes, porn is Soooo great for relationships!
To summarise: Commitment is a dinosaur word that has no meaning to anything whatsoever as relates to men and their view of women. However, a man will commit to love, honouring his car , no problem. (See other dinosaur words such as “Emotion”, “Feelings”, and “L_O_V_E”. Maybe you could play a game and find similar dinosaur words too! Have fun!
“Oh J Lo and Ben are sooooo happy. She has found the ideal formula (being perfect and famous and rich in her own right, and even learning strip-tease to keep Bennie boy at home away from da hoes down the strip club) for keeping a man. Oh and Jenn and Brad…such a golden happy couple! Jenn has also been such a role model for women to aspire to for lessons in how to find and keep a man. At last, our faith has been restored in L-O-V-E!! Happy Days!
Angelina who?
Shit….ok well uhhhhmmmmm…….. hmmmmmm
Angelina who?
Shit….ok well uhhhhmmmmm…….. hmmmmmm
by MissyM May 6, 2005
Get the Committment mug.The commandments that Moses dropped on the way down the mountain and were recovered by three dudes in Colorado. These were the real commandments written as law for stoners, sinners and macdaddy's.
1. thought shalt get laid
2.though shall not be gay
3.thou shalt have a honey wagon
4. thou shalt scam on honeys
5.thou shall not rub thine self in vasaline
6.thou shall not finger thine cat (that means you kris!!)
7. thou shall make monthly pilgrameges to the mall in search for slimys
8.thou shall get stoned
9. gretta is a bitch and that is that
10. though sall not name thine kid isaac (god that's a gay name)
1. thought shalt get laid
2.though shall not be gay
3.thou shalt have a honey wagon
4. thou shalt scam on honeys
5.thou shall not rub thine self in vasaline
6.thou shall not finger thine cat (that means you kris!!)
7. thou shall make monthly pilgrameges to the mall in search for slimys
8.thou shall get stoned
9. gretta is a bitch and that is that
10. though sall not name thine kid isaac (god that's a gay name)
by biscuit bega December 31, 2005
Get the The Commandments mug.The natural and perpetual state of human males.
Lacking the decency and character to invest one's time and energy into a long-term relationship or a marriage. May be caused by an over-production of testosterone, immaturity, inflated ego, and in most cases, simply being male.
Side effects may include frequent breakups and new girlfriends, frequent one-night stands, general unreliability in a relationship of any type, and a vocabulary of bullshitty dating jargon such as "I just want to be friends with you."
99.9% of all men are born with this condition, guaranteeing that women will spend most of their dating years with shitty, unreliable, wimpy men.
Lacking the decency and character to invest one's time and energy into a long-term relationship or a marriage. May be caused by an over-production of testosterone, immaturity, inflated ego, and in most cases, simply being male.
Side effects may include frequent breakups and new girlfriends, frequent one-night stands, general unreliability in a relationship of any type, and a vocabulary of bullshitty dating jargon such as "I just want to be friends with you."
99.9% of all men are born with this condition, guaranteeing that women will spend most of their dating years with shitty, unreliable, wimpy men.
"My boyfriend just broke up with me after we'd only been dating 2 months. I think he's afraid of commitment."
Samuel was so afraid of commitment that he dumped every girl he dated as soon as he realized she was actually willing to work at a relationship.
"I can't get married...I'm afraid of commitment!"
Samuel was so afraid of commitment that he dumped every girl he dated as soon as he realized she was actually willing to work at a relationship.
"I can't get married...I'm afraid of commitment!"
by randomperson890 March 20, 2010
Get the afraid of commitment mug.Thou shall not kill. One of the biggest most important commandments that contradicts itself because throughout history more people have been killed in the name of god, than for any other reason or cause. It seems religions don't care if you have to kill, as long as you are doing it for the lord.
Priest: Remember the Sixth commandment, now lets go rid god's world of those Blasphemous unbelievers.
by Smart Person December 18, 2004
Get the 6th commandment mug.