Ten Commandments of Dating

1. Thou shalt not date friends of friends

2. Thou shalt not ask someone out over the internet, unless it is absolutely necessary

3. Thou shalt not break up with thy partner over the phone or internet, in any case.

4. Thou shalt not make plans for the future, unless thou plans to fulfill them

5. Thou shalt not send mixed messages and signals

6. Thou shalt not cheat on thy partner.

7. Thou shall reject activities involving a name as an adjective

8. Thou shalt not use fecal matter in romantic ways

9. Thou shall be a dick for up to 6 hours after a break up. after this time, thou shalt not hold grudges.

10. Thou shall change the lingus, if thou is unsatisfied

Translation of the Ten Commandments of Dating

1. dont date your friend's friends. it gets awkward

2. its pretty tactless and impersonal

3. Really? a break up shouldnt be sprung on someone in an indirect way

4. Dont give false hope, it's unappreciated

5. Mislead people become confused people. confused people become ANGRY people.

6. infidelity is a dick move

7. (ie. cleveland steamer) DONT DO IT

8. poo and intimacy. its just wrong. back off fecalphiliacs.

9. get all the emotions out, move on. no holds barred.

10. Anna, Donna, Connor. the three lingus friends. figure it out, choose one.

by Greengiant 894 April 30, 2010