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"He wears a..." Bass Pro Shop Hat. WTF?

A hat to be worn by only the sexiest of mutha fuckas! If worn, you must advertise with "I'll make your fantasy cum true" or a "Fah-Nasty cum true!," This must also occur with a picture of your butt-ass naked sexy self while also covering your Johnson with something sexy and inconspicuous, like a hammer or a 23" length horse condom.

For example, you must imagine yourself riding on a glorious (photo-shopped) horse. Cause it's fucking cool and you're wearing a Bass Pro Hat. Just bear in mind; however, that YOU are the Stallion here, NOT that ugly horse. You also can pretend to fake rub your ass against that furry, hard back. It reminds me of when I was a Bear...

Anyway, when you're oiled up like a slice of New York pepperoni and naked all the way down to your fuckin sexy-ass filled-to-the-rim with hot sexy maleness of a pinky toe, you don that BASS MUTHA FUCKIN PRO Shop hat! Suck it bitches! No really, you can. For a fee. Check out my Facebook page special this week "FAH-NASTYs do cum true! Cum to my mom's basement, where I'll pamper and rub my olive oil covered sexiness to completion." *Available only this Wednesday at 10pm. Special $9.99! Friends and family discount $7.99. PS Wear a wig for $20 discount.

Then, swing your Johnson to the other side of the horse (or just wear a tube shock to be photshopped out). Look at the camera like you're the biggest, baddest, sexist piece of hot steaming Man in the land! Then smile and say, "I'm One Sexy Mutha Fucka!"
"He wears a..." Bass Pro Shop Hat. WTF?

Bass Pro Shop hat definition: A hat worn by only the sexiest of people.

For example, used in a sentence and conversation:

John: What's up with Bass Pro Shop hat? WTF? I don't get it.

Rye Rye: "Cause he's the sexiest Mutha Fucka in ALL the land! I mean come on! Just look at him! He's marvelous and magnificent and only the sexiest of mutha fuckas like him can wear one."
by John Olanzapine May 14, 2022
mugGet the "He wears a..." Bass Pro Shop Hat. WTF?mug.
the most vulgar term that can cause 9.0 earthquakes across the world
omg who dropped their hotdog?
what the frick frack dick slap pussy ass buttcrack lackback stupidass cupid last cast best ass less bass is this stupid shit
boy watch your mouth before i frick frack diddily dack patty wack snick snack crack pack slack mack quarterback crackerjack biofeedback backtrack thumbtack sidetrack tic-tac out of you!!
by fuckitimgoingtohell September 24, 2021
mugGet the what the frick frack dick slap pussy ass buttcrack lackback stupidass cupid last cast best ass less bass is this stupid shitmug.

Bass Cannon

A large cannon, typically wielded by a pony DJ, That uses high frequency noise and extremely fast paced bass to carve out large areas of land that people ( or ponies ) that pissed them off recently stood on.
Damn, Did you see that jackass cranky get obliterated by that bass cannon?
by Mr. Dr. Prof. Phil July 10, 2016
mugGet the Bass Cannonmug.

jamie bass

Someone who believes they're sexy but actually looks worse than a frog with a microscopic sized penis.
Wow! He's soooo Jamie bass.
by Kijate01 June 2, 2016
mugGet the jamie bassmug.

British bass

A British Bass is when a skanky female who has so much cheap make up she is shiny and lip filler proceeds to blow your cock like a piece of rabbit intestine in the Arctic.
This call girl looking ass gave be a British bass last night. It hurt like hell.
by I like the thicc Bois November 13, 2020
mugGet the British bassmug.

Bass boomer

That thing that make bass in cars for the stereo
That bass boomer is really loud
by Bass boomer April 20, 2021
mugGet the Bass boomermug.

String bass

Bass instrument of the string family as opposed to the tuba or sousaphone of the brass family. In years past it was common for instrumentalists to be proficient in both instruments; tuba and string bass. Brass bass is easier to march with for parades and such. While string bass is often preferred in instances such as concert and dance ensembles because it is physically less effort to play over longer periods of time
I can bow my string bass night long
by FiSH March 24, 2020
mugGet the String bassmug.

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