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Jesus H. Christ

"I am God."
- Jesus H. Christ
by Andrew Whiteingale W w00t February 26, 2025
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Jesus Christ

Yes, it's multiple parts this one...

*The wilderness*

Lucifer "Oh what in the fuck is it now!?"

Jesus "Hey man! Long time no see! What's it been? 30 years? I'm a guy now."

Lucifer "This is what you've been doing!? You can't be a guy!"

Jesus "I am. I'm Jesus Christ now."
Lucifer "JESUS CHRIST!"

Jesus "Yep."

Lucifer "Jesus Christ! This is ridiculous. You can't be a guy. Change back! Change back immediately!"

Jesus "Oho can't I? Are you my dad now? Ok father. I won't be a guy *Father*."

Father "I don't need to be your father to- Wait... *Father* YOU SON OF A BITCH! What are you going to do!? What are THEY going to do!? They are going to fuck your shit up!"

Jesus "Oh I know."

Father 😨

Jesus 🤨

Father "What the fuck is happening right now..."

Jesus "Uuuuummmm I'm a guy now. I did some cool stuff. They're going to kill me. And.. then... I'm... Gonna... I donno... I'll just come back or something. Or not. Or come back for a bit and then go back and then come back later. It's gonna be tight!"

Father "Jesus Christ... That is fucking stupid man. Absolutely dumb. Why would you come here just to let em kill you?"

Jesus "Save me then idiot! Heheheh!"

Lucifer "No. No, I'm not going to save you from- What is there to even save you from?"

Jesus "Exactly. Hey, we're having a party man you should come out! We got... Um... Bread. We're gonna split a bottle of wine between... Well, between the 14 of us I guess. It's gonna be dope."

Father "TSK! Getthefuckouttaherewiththat! No! NO! I'm not going to 'party' and I'm not going to be a part of any of this."

Jesus "Your loss man parties are fun."

Father 😨

Jesus "Alright man I'll see you later." 😌🖐

Father 😨
by Hym Iam August 9, 2023
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Christ Cream

when he waves his dick in the shape of a cross while he cums on your face with rosary beads in one hand and repeating the lords prayer.
by christcreamer May 15, 2023
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jebubebus christ

The official love child of Jesus and Satan
My lord and savior is jebubebus Christ
by Bobbyross420 May 24, 2018
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Mother of Jesus Christ

Something you yell out when your team is losing or you have to pay a expensive bill.
John- Mother of Jesus Christ i can't believe the Patriots are losing to the Raiders

Me- I guess the patriots just suck
by Crzyfkr October 9, 2010
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Jesus Christ

A mild swear word to describe the body parts this is a religious swear word and was a big thing back I'm the day don't it in a religious hall especially in a church
by Hiyalolasr January 23, 2025
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Alba and Christ

The sweetest couple in the world, lovely people on their own too.
Wow look at them, so cute! They're definitely like Alba and Christ
by DutchBallVIII February 18, 2021
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