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Idiom. Used to describe a person's lack of intelligence or inability to perform/achieve a simple task.
Is it any surprise how badly he did? That idiot can't light a birthday candle with a blowtorch.
by Catfish Baruni June 16, 2016
mugGet the Can't light a birthday candle with a blowtorchmug.
This is a local phrase used mostly by Nigerian millennials as witty remarks, to describe a scenario where one is tired or gives up on a situation or thing.

In a nutshell, it's used to describe a scenario where something is incapable of being solved or accomplished.
Since my last relationship, my life has been nothing but peace at its finest. Ah, I can't coman go and kee mysef.

After cooking the meals and tucking the kids to bed by 10pm, you still expect me to do your laundry? I can't coman go and kee mysef o.
by Candyswrites January 3, 2020
mugGet the I can't coman go and kee mysefmug.

you can't unpee your pants

Phrase said commonly to explain the irreversability of one's actions, especially ones that damage onesself
- "I fucked up by telling my teacher shes stupid"
- "Yeah man, thats your fault, you can't unpee your pants"
by idiommaster October 16, 2023
mugGet the you can't unpee your pantsmug.
Kale is slang for money, it's not just cabbage, which is also slang for money, so you can't have your money and spend it too. It's my updated version of the idiom, " you can't have your cake and eat it too".
Put your money in a safe place son, because you can't have your kale and spend it too.
by 2B+ November 27, 2019
mugGet the you can't have your kale and spend it toomug.

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