analogue wank

Having to revert to the more traditional methods of masturbation by using "old skool" materials such as books, magazines and rude drawings.
My fucking internet isn't getting connected for another fortnight! I'm gonna have to settle for an analogue wank tonight instead of YouJizz!
by darkh0rse July 01, 2011
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Wiki Wank

A deliberate alteration of an article found in Wikipedia often in the form of vandalism, damage control or to add a "spin" to a subject or movement.

Wikipedia is edited by anonymous users and sometimes "editors" modify listings in Wikipedia to suit an agenda or for mere sport, mockery or as vandals.

Such a modification is called a "Wiki Wank"
OMG! Did you see the screenshot of the Wikipedia page about the Obama? It said on Wikipedia that Obama started world war 2! Apparently it didn't get noticed or changed for 3 months...what a perfect Wiki Wank!
by TruthAboveAllPleasures February 26, 2009
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Fuck Wank

A person who cannot be described solely as a fucker or a wanker and instead is referred to as a fuck wank.
Matthew Baird is a fuck wank.
by Oxford warrior August 24, 2011
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extreme wanking

The art of masturbating till near climax. Whereabouts you shout: "Hey mum come here a minute!". You then have the time it take till you mum arrives to finish jacking off and get cleaned up.
by Alex and Rob February 19, 2003
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Code Wank

code /ko?d/ kohd noun, verb, cod·ed, cod·ing.
wank /wæ?k/ wangk Chiefly British Slang: Vulgar

Creating code that does not relate to the core purpose of a project. Basically wanking around with peripheral tasks

- source. Dave Fleming
"Lets avoid wasting time with any code wank on this project"
by bluemedia October 05, 2007
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Chimp Wank

It is the act of taping ones penis to ones leg with either tape or cling film and wanking with his leg like a chimp.

The main advantage of this is that one can still eat and drink at the same time like a Sir.
Sir 1 "Dude we used so much tape and cling film"
Sir 2 "What having a chimp wank?"
by Bashtoe April 01, 2012
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Blitz-Wank

Noun: blitz-wank - a wank that should never exceed more than roughly one minute. Any longer than that and it can no longer be classed as a B.W.

Verb: to blitz-wank - the act of furiously masturbating so as to achieve and orgasm in a very particular time constraint.

For the gentleman who just needs to get something out of his system in a record breaking time.
A day at the office-
Bob: Fml, this work is really getting me down. No wonder the statistics of office suicides are so high lately.
Pete: Just go into the supplies cupboard and rub out a BW my friend.
Bob: BW?
Pete: Blitz-wank! It's where you choke the life out of your chicken until it sqwarks in around a minute.
*after a brief blitz-wanking session bob returns to his desk and completes all of his assignments to an exceptional standard*
Bob: Remember kids, if it weren't for BWs, I wouldn't be where I am today.
by Russian Roller November 25, 2010
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