A police officer, especially one who reflexively uses his or her Taser in situations in which a real cop would rely on his or her wits and communication skills.
Peace Loving Citizen: Excuse me, officer, might you have the time?
Taser Monkey (later, to Grand Jury): The perpetrator approached me and presented a reasonable request in a peaceable manner. I had no choice but to tase him. And tasers are "non-lethal" so it's obvious he died on purpose just to frame me.
Grand Jury: But your victim was a 90-year-old man with a heart condition in a wheelchair with an oxygen tank... asking for the time. And you killed him.
Taser Monkey: Exactly. He could have been a terrorist with a wheelchair bomb, plotting to kill me and everyone else in the area. A lesser cop might have answered with the time and we could all be dead right now!
Grand Jury: Oh right! What were we thinking? Of course we'll side with you no matter what. Fuck the citizens!
Taser Monkey (later, to Grand Jury): The perpetrator approached me and presented a reasonable request in a peaceable manner. I had no choice but to tase him. And tasers are "non-lethal" so it's obvious he died on purpose just to frame me.
Grand Jury: But your victim was a 90-year-old man with a heart condition in a wheelchair with an oxygen tank... asking for the time. And you killed him.
Taser Monkey: Exactly. He could have been a terrorist with a wheelchair bomb, plotting to kill me and everyone else in the area. A lesser cop might have answered with the time and we could all be dead right now!
Grand Jury: Oh right! What were we thinking? Of course we'll side with you no matter what. Fuck the citizens!
by taserbrain February 12, 2010
Get the Taser Monkeymug. Having an obsession with anything vehicle related! Spending hrs and hours researching and building a particular type of vehicle to perfection. While being amazing at everything!
Those Gear Monkey’s spent hours building thier ultra4 vehicle!
That Gear Monkey was moving quick through the desert!
Baby don’t worry, I’m a Gear Monkey!
I wish I was a Gear Monkey to be as cool as that guy!
Don’t worry I can Gear Monkey it!
He was driving like a Gear Monkey!
If only I could Gear Monkey
She was totally Gear Monkey last night!
That Gear Monkey was moving quick through the desert!
Baby don’t worry, I’m a Gear Monkey!
I wish I was a Gear Monkey to be as cool as that guy!
Don’t worry I can Gear Monkey it!
He was driving like a Gear Monkey!
If only I could Gear Monkey
She was totally Gear Monkey last night!
by The Gear Monkey May 9, 2018
Get the Gear Monkeymug. by Young James April 23, 2008
Get the monkey tugmug. A shuttle-Monkey is someone who prefers to get a lift up a mountain by car or chairlift instead of putting in the effort to ride up and earn the downhill rip.
by onedollarbill October 18, 2006
Get the Shuttle-Monkeymug. by okmnjiuhbvgytfcxdr July 15, 2022
Get the favela monkeymug. by goofy ahh travis scott May 4, 2022
Get the Monkey Touchmug. When someone is punked(tricked), they have been monkey trapped. Originally from a volleyball play where the attacker baits the opponent to touch the net and end in a point for the other team.
by ggggvgggg October 30, 2011
Get the monkey trapmug.