Guy 1: hey i made you some cupcakes :)
(Guy 1): )(OLY S)(IT what 8rand are they
Guy 1: oh it's just the normal betty crocker cake mix
(Guy 1): 🙂
Guy 1: stop looking at me like that man you're too damn parenthetical. you need an intervention
(Guy 1): )(OLY S)(IT what 8rand are they
Guy 1: oh it's just the normal betty crocker cake mix
(Guy 1): 🙂
Guy 1: stop looking at me like that man you're too damn parenthetical. you need an intervention
by jaspers serket November 30, 2025
Get the Parenthetical mug.When the “cost” of being a parent keeps going up—not in dollars, but in expectations. The idea that you have a chorus of PTA Karens and amateur child therapists looking over your shoulder, ready to call CPS if your kid faces any hardship whatsoever, while your tiny, Wi-Fi-enabled know-it-all doesn’t want to see “a dinosaur”—they want to see a Parasaurolophus, accurate to scale.
Symptoms may include:
-Packing three separate snacks because one is gluten-free, one is dye-free, and one is “crunchy but not too crunchy.”
-Talking to your child in calm therapist-speak so you don’t go to jail while they’re actively feral in the grocery store.
-Scheduling your kid’s life like they’re training for the Olympics at age six.
-Staying within three feet of them at all times because God forbid they fall off the monkey bars.
Symptoms may include:
-Packing three separate snacks because one is gluten-free, one is dye-free, and one is “crunchy but not too crunchy.”
-Talking to your child in calm therapist-speak so you don’t go to jail while they’re actively feral in the grocery store.
-Scheduling your kid’s life like they’re training for the Olympics at age six.
-Staying within three feet of them at all times because God forbid they fall off the monkey bars.
“Bro can you imagine our dads confirming snacks, screen limits, and emergency contacts just so we could go to a birthday party? My dad would’ve just tossed me out of the truck at whatever house looked right, and said ‘don’t die.’ Parentflation is real."
by ScaryFeet December 9, 2025
Get the Parentflation mug.Related Words
parez
• parezay
• parental controls
• paree
• pare
• parentnoia
• parentals
• Parental Advisory
• Parental Notification
• parental unit
My father is being a parentaurus about everything. Any advice I try to give him is no good, wrong, and dismissed.
by CreativeBruces December 11, 2025
Get the Parentaurus mug.by TheFemThemGhoulMormer January 10, 2026
Get the Pareal mug.short for or slang for a dim witted single parent who otherwise thinks they are doing the work of two parents.
by Howard Cunningham August 1, 2012
Get the dingle parent mug.by TheForrestExperience February 4, 2014
Get the hannah pareja mug.Dad: Did you put the lil monster in bed?
Mom: Sure did, used my Ninja Parenting skills to get out of the room without waking him!
Mom: Sure did, used my Ninja Parenting skills to get out of the room without waking him!
by Malent October 23, 2014
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