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Ass Cream

A clear like cream you can buy at any pharmacy or your local Walmart This is used when your ass is drier than a desert due to cold temperatures. It helps relive itching or make you feel better after you toke a massive shit that ripped your asshole.

In order to use this cream please follow the directions below:

1. Open the lid (assuming you have all ready have the cream in hand)
2. Use your index and middle to scoop up the cream
3. Spread dem ass cheeks (to do this use the palms of both hands and pull apart till you cant no more)
4. Using your index and middle gracefully rub the cream on your asshole and the parts around it. Be generous when putting on the cream it would be embarrassing if you had to go again in the middle of that date because you feel itchy down there.
5. Close the lid and apply more when needed also wash your hands when your done, you nasty fuck.
"hey jessie you got any of that ass cream you carry around?"
"yeah i have it with me right now here"
"thanks its drier than a desert ever since we got here im gonna go butter up my pooper now"
"ok you go do that ill wait right here"
by homelesstoad June 28, 2014
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Strawberrys and Cream

This being the resulting mixture of semen and menstrual fluid, so called due to the red and white colour.
I fucked Sandra during her period, shot my load and she fanny farted the strawberrys and cream on to the bed sheets.
by Clinton Sounds February 1, 2004
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cream eggs

Chocolate covered cream in the shape of an egg.
Eggzample: Cadburys cream eggs.
by Skellyscribbles April 29, 2006
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cream-my-pantsarific

1. Something that is so terrific that it brings you to an instant orgasm or feeling of orgasmic pleasantness.
2. An object of lust that does, in fact, make you cream your pants when the subject is brought up/seen.
3. A brilliant mixture of the words "cream" "my" "pants" "Absolutely and "terrific" (making "cream-my-pantsarific") to describe something so desirable that you are brought to orgasm.
Johnny Depp is cream-my-pantsarific!
by A person May 23, 2006
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69 cream pie

Two women having both recently had intercourse with the same man who ejaculated into each of them performing cunnilingus on the other.
Jack's bliss babe Anne and their girlfriend did the 69 cream pie while he got ready for another round.
by maplefrost May 26, 2009
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ice cream gland

the gland that makes lazy people fat when they claim to have a gland problem
that person can't lose weight b/c he has an ice cream gland
by robdog073191 May 4, 2005
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spice cream

Superheated, ultra-painful liquid feces brought on by ingesting spicy food and/or cheap alcohol.
"Man, I was in tears on the bowl for an hour from the Spice Cream the wings and beer gave me."
by Whitey McGee September 22, 2007
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