by PieKnee May 8, 2016
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Get the Retirement Beard mug.Facial hair worn by pussified, emasculated cucks who have sacrificed their testicles, wallets and pride to domineering female spouses or significant others in exchange for sex and social acceptance.
Similar in look to the ever popular dad beard, men who sport a provider beard often have one or more of the following traits: a side-parted preppy hairstyle, SJW approved eyeglasses (for the visually impaired) J. Crew polo shirts, Nantucket shorts, Sperry Top-Siders and an aura of feigned happiness.
Similar in look to the ever popular dad beard, men who sport a provider beard often have one or more of the following traits: a side-parted preppy hairstyle, SJW approved eyeglasses (for the visually impaired) J. Crew polo shirts, Nantucket shorts, Sperry Top-Siders and an aura of feigned happiness.
Hey, who is the bearded guy driving the soccer mom SUV? Oh, that’s just your cousin. His provider beard is all that remains of his manhood after his wife made him have a vasectomy.
by DJtadd May 21, 2021
Get the provider beard mug.Attempting to pick up a member of the opposite sex when the chance of success is 1 in a million ("So you're saying there's a chance?"). For example, your buddy gets rejected by an out-of-his-league hottie at a gas station while his friends laugh at his chicken-covered-beard.
Having departed KFC after drunken spring break binge, your buddy gets laughed out of the gas station after attempting chicken-bearding.
by batmap October 15, 2014
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