by Holly Matzz May 15, 2011

You're afraid of admitting to rooting for the Dallas Cowboys. So, you go overboard pretending to root for another team.
Guy at the bar, says go Tampa Bay!! But, talking Cowboys for 5 minutes prior. I say, wow what a closet cowboy!
by Kewihe March 14, 2016

Someone who acts like they’re innocent and just your mans friend but down to fuck him the first chance they get behind your back.
by Iseeyoubiatch May 8, 2018

the type of haircut usually associated with "metrosexuals" who have a fancy for the Didgeridoo. This is for the likeness between sucking cock and playing a didgeridoo. This haircut is called the Closet Haircut because it is how the closet homosexual starts his process of coming out of the metophorical gay butt sex closet. This haircut is usually only produced in Los Angeles, but somehow found its way to Dallas, Texas.
by The Branch December 6, 2010

noun, a person you would not normally tag as a dirty person because they put whatever is messy out of sight. For example into a drawer or closet where one does not normally look.
On the surface, Jenny is a really nice girl. But beneath her happy and bubbly exterior lies a closet slob so bad that if you opened her closet doors, there would literally be an avalanche of random junk.
by Crazybmws February 19, 2012

"That guy eats a shit ton of food on the daily, but he still manages to maintain a weight of 70kg. He's a closet fatass"
by Guacamole Nigga Penis555 October 6, 2020

When a friend, usually a roommate, hides in your closet in order to secretly watch you having sex with your significant other.
Guy: "Man get the fuck out of my closet.... Im fucking my girlfriend"
Friend: "Come on, I just want some closet theater!"
Friend: "Come on, I just want some closet theater!"
by Jdub3l September 26, 2009
