dicktarded

the unequivocal response to a statement or action that is severely lacking in any trace of logic, reason, or any sort of intellect. used best in conjunction with awkward pauses when someone you don't like makes an obviously wrong statement and you feel like embarrassing them in front of their peers.

Sean: Do you guys think you can go to war and kill someone?

Danny: I think i could, because i wrestled and paintball.

(silence)

Dylan: That was so dicktarded it disproved natural selection.

by TheButtePirate March 25, 2009

dicktate

When a man's penis instead of his brain decides his actions , most commonly happens when aroused from a girl.

*at a dance party*
"Dude, that guy is bumping hard into every chick he dances with!"
"Lol, he's dicktated"

by Jawnie April 26, 2015

Dicktaphone

To put your dick to the telephone speaker when talking to a ladyfriend when she is boring the arse off you about babies or flowers or something else that's all girlyfied.

Dicktaphone is when on the phone to Ann Coulter and she's banging on about politics or crap etc. and you realise you're her husband as your cock falls out of your pants into the reciever.

by Sir Bartholomew McTavish August 12, 2008

dickarooni

a person who is a asshole, stupid, annoying, or just a dick . esp; people who draw dicks on peoples facebook wall and or desks.

"Dude, Zach, you're such a fucking dickarooni for putting dicks everywhere on desks in your science class!"

by DFrank June 19, 2009

Dicktric System

The universal basis of dick sizes with 6 inches being the median represented by a number 5 on the scale of 1 - 10, 10 being the biggest. The result is stated as a dicktric number. This also converts dick size from the metric system. Ex: median dicktric number of 5 would be 15.2 centimeters.

I thought I had a big penis but the after looking at the dicktric system, I realize that I am pretty undersized.

I used the dicktric system and found that my dick has a dicktric number of 6. Score.

by 007hippo September 29, 2009

dickfart

A self-important man who doesn't command the respect that he believes he does and therefore is not taken seriously by his peers and cohorts.

Often, as means to extract comedic value from a dickfart, he will be led to believe that his misbegotten status is legitimate, further making his false sense of authority appear that much more absurd.

I can't believe that dickfart just tried to tell us all how to do our jobs. How can he think he has any credibility when he doesn't even prepare for the meeting?

by hinder90 February 23, 2010

Dicktree

A word used to insult those who are so incredably uncool as to ressemble a tree made of dick.

Asian: "Yaow, I got A++ this assignment with barely even try! Time to play laptop with my exchange parents! ^^ "

White d00d: "Shut the fuck up dicktree!"

by Jordan September 29, 2004