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Wearing your dick on your sleeve

The act of being obvious in your intentions to have sex with a woman so as to avoid entering the friend zone.

This method could mean the difference between a man spending months of time, energy, and money on a girl only to be told, "I really like you a lot, but I don't want to ruin the friendship we have." , and finding out immediately whether or not he might be getting laid and if he should continue his endeavors to do so with this woman.
nice guy: You know that beautiful girl I've been chasing for months? She just friend-ed me.

Friend: You should have been wearing your dick on your sleeve, man. You could have saved a lot of time and moved on to the next girl.
by Sanewma January 8, 2012
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Wearing It

"Your're wearing it"
"You're such a wear"
"I just wore it in math class"
by Jude Tortorella December 28, 2005
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Wearing the Crimson Mask

This is a "mask" that a person wears when they have been thoroughly beaten to the point where there whole face is covered in blood.
In Rocky 4, Apollo Creed was wearing the crimson mask before he died.
by Inspector Gadget September 7, 2004
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You might as well be wearing broccoli for shoes.

1. Expression for for doing something foolish or unnecessary.

2. Possessing an item that serves no purpose and/or is useless.
Person: "I just bought some new alien detecting binoculars"
Me: "You might as well be wearing broccoli for shoes."
by Sheppison September 18, 2010
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"I'm not wearing those pants."

When something is uncomfortable or awkward, and you want to avoid it, or change the subject.
Someone says:
How did your date last night go?
You say:
"I'm not wearing those pants."
by nicole szanto February 6, 2007
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Wearing your glasses

To 'wear someones glasses' is get the better of somebody, or to one-up them. In other words, to pwn them. The usage is similar to the phrase 'wearing the pants' in a relationship.

It is most relevant when you're getting the better of somebody right in front of their face without them realising it. When you want to draw attention to the fact that you're pwning them, simply declare that you're 'wearing their glasses'.

If you're 'wearing your own glasses', that means that you've pwned yourself accidentally or absent-mindedly. (If you accidentally chopped off your hand while cooking, for example.)

The phrase comes from a Perry Bible Fellowship comic strip (entitled 'Q. P. Inc') where the protagonist attends a job interview for Quick People Incorporated and manages to dumbfound the interviewer by somehow stealing the glasses right off his face without him noticing.

"You're just telling me what I want to hear." - "Actually, I'm just wearing your glasses." - "... Welcome aboard."
1. Declaring that you're getting the better of somebody.

(Noticing that all the beer has gone) "HEY! Did you drink all my beer?"
(Drinking the last beer) "Actually, I'm just wearing your glasses."

2. Getting the better of yourself accidentally.

"Man, my back hurts. I was carrying some heavy boxes and I slipped and fell down a flight of stairs. I was really wearing my own glasses that day."

3. Getting bested by somebody else.

A) "I've finally finished this damn project, now I just have to save it."
B) "You haven't saved it yet?"
(A's baby brother pulls out the power cable.)
A) "Damn it!"
B) "Heh. Looks like your kid brother is wearing your glasses tonight."
by MrDees July 9, 2009
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crayon eating glue sniffing helmet wearing window licker

Something my mom calls me on the daily; A dumbass; A retard
God dammit, you're such a crayon eating glue sniffing helmet wearing window licker
by Weird Uncle Al December 18, 2019
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