Telepathetic

Having the ability to see the future of totally useless events and no ability whatsoever to foresee anything useful.

Mary," Sue, I kept dreaming all night about spilled coffee."

Then a coworker walks in laughing about the boss spilled coffee all over his shirt .

Sue asks Mary to pick a lottery ticket and Mary picks a loser.

Sue."Thanks Mary, you must be telepathetic!"

by kaoschikk January 25, 2010

Telepathetic Powers

a syndrome known for its vast fake results in predicting the

future or failure in assisting law enforcement in finding a

stunt purse at sketch pad

usually ran in infomercials at 3am and prone to make

believers of weak minds in upper class flap traps

doing the Prozac Shuffle .

dude, my telepathetic powers need a boost, put some toothpaste on my cig so i can get a clearer view of the future.

by Mickey Darling August 3, 2009

telepathetic

Totally and utterly pathetic and/or useless with televisions and other kinds of technology.

Me: Hey Mom, would you mind turning on the TV?
Mom: Sure, sweetie.
*silence*
Mom: Umm... where's the 'on' button?
Me: ...I love you Mom, but you're telepathetic.

by AllieCakesMuffinlegs March 16, 2008

telegraph

To flail about in a strange way as an excuse to make sexual contact with someone near you.

She had to leave because Tony kept telegraphing her.

That guy is a total telegraphist!

by Regular Pauly D March 27, 2011

Telepathetic

The psychic ability people develop that allows them to detect pathetic losers from a comfortable distance.

From Monique's unique position, upside down on the pole as it were, and her keenly honed telepathetic abilities she new which guys had the cash she needed for the night.

by Plagerdiasus III June 11, 2015

telegraph intersection

A traffic intersection that, because of a lack of a protected turn and the flow of traffic, only lets one vehicle through per cycle of lights.

That guy up there is turning left and the light just turned green, by the time he turns, it'll be red again. I hate telegraph intersections.

by Lord Butterknife May 19, 2017

telepathic tramp

That bitch that be living next door but you can read her mind and she hella flirting wit yo man but you can't prove it so you buy some aluminum foil and start wearing it on yo head to block her telepathic tramp thoughts.

The bitch Sally is such a telepathic tramp she keeps asking my man to come over through the walls but I can't prove it.

by lizdawiz January 31, 2019