Murphys gay law

A term used to describe a time when you are having or have had a lot of bad luck or problems that are really messing your life up. When you feel like you have had more than your share of bad luck.

Joe: I just rolled my car so I wont be at the party tonight!
Greg: Man you are really having some bad luck! Didnt you just tell me you cut your arm off yesterday?!
Joe: Ya that right! Its Murphys gay law!

by txfarmboy May 10, 2011

Murphy's Locker room Law

When you select a locker in an empty locker room, the next person coming back to their locker will be right next to yours. If they happen to enter at the exact moment you're putting on your underwear, then their locker will be on the opposite side of you and they'll have to shuffle by uncomfortably close.

Me: (putting on underwear in the locker room)
Next guy: oh hi, I need to slip past you to get to my locker; hope you don't mind.
Me: No problem; it's Murphy's Locker room Law.
Next guy & Me: chuckle chuckle chuckle

by Grute Man August 27, 2017

Murphy's Pedestrian-Perks Law

Refers to the infuriatingly-common "lousy timing" occurrence of your seldom encountering the usually-hoped-for opportunities/pleasantries (i.e., neighbors relaxing on their front porches/lawns whom you can shoot the breeze with on your way by, pretty girls to hold hands with and "chat up for a few", sizable numbers of discarded returnable containers, etc.) whenever you're out for a stroll or otherwise leisurely traipsing around your local area on foot, yet when you either hitch a ride with someone or are "a man on a mission" in your own vehicle and thus you can't "acceptably" stop to avail yourself of any of these assorted "sidewalk delights", the roadsides you travel along will either be "chock-full of friendlies" or "Bottle/Can City", and so you'll be mentally "climbin' da walls" at having to agonizingly pass on by all of those much-desired goodies.

It was foggy and chilly when I started out walking around town to complete my weekly errands-list, and so there was hardly another soul outdoors, but then sometime later when I was riding back again with a neighbor who'd offered me a lift home, the weather turned clear and balmy again, and there were lots of smiley-faced sundress-clad cuties strolling the walks all over town! Guess it was Murphy's Pedestrian-Perks Law at work!

by QuacksO July 21, 2018

Murphy's Law of Getting Comfortable

"You can struggle for hours to get bearably comfortable --- i.e., warm enough, free of aches, etc. --- but then just as soon as you actually DO succeed in getting comfortably 'settled in' at long last, something unavoidable will come up dat will force you to relinquish said comfy position to go and tackle some disagreeable physical activity which will cause you to get chilly again, experience more bodily pain, etc."

Two "sister" examples of Murphy's Law of Getting Comfortable would be "Murphy's Law of Falling Asleep" (i.e., you can struggle for half the night or more to fall asleep, but then immediately after you finally drift off, someone or something comes along to wake you up again) and "Murphy's Law of Personal Comfort" (i.e., however comfortable you become will be in direct inverse proportion to da comfort of others in your vicinity; for example, da nearer you sit to a heater/air-conditioning duct, da more you will block da flow of said "moderated" air, and so while YOU YOURSELF may indeed feel more-tolerably warmer/cooler, EVERYONE ELSE in da room will feel even more uncomfortable than you would have if you'd sat a more-reasonable distance from said climate-control orifice. Or if you recline your seat on a public-transportation vehicle, said tilted-backwards back-rest will encroach on da extremely-limited "personal space" in front of da passenger seated behind you).

by QuacksO February 1, 2023

Murphy's Law of Attentiveness

Da "hanged if you do and hanged if you don't" fact-of-life irony regarding how a sizeable sector of da female populous treats any dude who shows interest in them romantically --- i.e., if a guy gets da idea from a gal's attitude/behavior towards him dat he should just mind his own business and not court her, she'll bawl and blubber dat he is making her feel ignored and unvalued. Yet if he then hastily begins persuing her in da naive belief dat this is what she wants, she'll go "bawlin' and blubberin" to da COPS and tearfully accuse him of harassing her! Can't win... :P

I always tread super-carefully when approaching a new lady for companionship or intimacy --- seems like Murphy's Law of Attentiveness is often lurking just around da corner to pounce on me and give me undeserved grief!

by QuacksO March 22, 2023

Murphy's Law of Staff-Availability

"If you have to request assistance/advice from a store/office-employee, you will be obliged to wander all over da place and "search till Doomsday" to find someone who is not presently too occupied to listen to you. Yet once you finally receive your answer, THEN there will be ABSOLUTE MULTITUDES OF PERSONNEL just lounging around and making themselves available, and so you will feel like a total JACKA** for not having simply waited a few more minutes to ask your question, rather than wearing out your feet and legs from running all over da shop to find someone to ask!"

I spent over five minutes scampering up and down the aisles at Wally-World trying to find a "free" employee to ask about the availability of a certain product, but then afterwards, there were several non-busy staffpeople whom I met en-route back to my shopping-cart whom I could have asked just as easily at that point --- talk about a classic case of Murphy's Law of Staff-Availability! :P :P

by QuacksO August 26, 2019

Murphy's Law of stacked boxes

"No matter how storage-containers are arranged in a stack, the one you want will always be on the bottom, and so you'll have to move all of the others first."

Regardless of whether you arrange a stack of boxes in alphabetical/numerical order from top to bottom or bottom to top, Murphy's Law of stacked boxes will always "get you" --- i.e., da box you'll need will always be ether da first or last one, depending on which way you stacked them, and so you'll always need to take them all down to get to da one you need.

by QuacksO February 28, 2025