Murphys gay law

A term used to describe a time when you are having or have had a lot of bad luck or problems that are really messing your life up. When you feel like you have had more than your share of bad luck.

Joe: I just rolled my car so I wont be at the party tonight!
Greg: Man you are really having some bad luck! Didnt you just tell me you cut your arm off yesterday?!
Joe: Ya that right! Its Murphys gay law!

by txfarmboy May 10, 2011

Murphy's Locker room Law

When you select a locker in an empty locker room, the next person coming back to their locker will be right next to yours. If they happen to enter at the exact moment you're putting on your underwear, then their locker will be on the opposite side of you and they'll have to shuffle by uncomfortably close.

Me: (putting on underwear in the locker room)
Next guy: oh hi, I need to slip past you to get to my locker; hope you don't mind.
Me: No problem; it's Murphy's Locker room Law.
Next guy & Me: chuckle chuckle chuckle

by Grute Man August 27, 2017

Murphy's Pedestrian-Perks Law

Refers to the infuriatingly-common "lousy timing" occurrence of your seldom encountering the usually-hoped-for opportunities/pleasantries (i.e., neighbors relaxing on their front porches/lawns whom you can shoot the breeze with on your way by, pretty girls to hold hands with and "chat up for a few", sizable numbers of discarded returnable containers, etc.) whenever you're out for a stroll or otherwise leisurely traipsing around your local area on foot, yet when you either hitch a ride with someone or are "a man on a mission" in your own vehicle and thus you can't "acceptably" stop to avail yourself of any of these assorted "sidewalk delights", the roadsides you travel along will either be "chock-full of friendlies" or "Bottle/Can City", and so you'll be mentally "climbin' da walls" at having to agonizingly pass on by all of those much-desired goodies.

It was foggy and chilly when I started out walking around town to complete my weekly errands-list, and so there was hardly another soul outdoors, but then sometime later when I was riding back again with a neighbor who'd offered me a lift home, the weather turned clear and balmy again, and there were lots of smiley-faced sundress-clad cuties strolling the walks all over town! Guess it was Murphy's Pedestrian-Perks Law at work!

by QuacksO July 21, 2018

Murphy's Law of Spares

"If you buy just one of something, you will surely break it almost immediately, but if you buy one or more "spare" items to have "just in case", your "initial" item will miraculously escape damage no matter how many mishaps you endure, and thus those duplicate items will merely gather dust in the garage or at the back of your desk-drawer."

I have always tried to handle objects gently and carefully, but due to extreme forgetfulness and physical/mental/emotional infirmities, I tend to "be rough on my stuff" --- sitting/stepping on unobserved items, blundering into objects as I'm groggily stumbling to the bathroom in the middle of the night, soiling items or spilling/dropping stuff, etc., and so I occasionally attempt to "prepare for the future" by acquiring spares of the types of items which I typically seem to damage or break; only prob is that just as soon as I do "lay in for a rainy day" like that, the "currently-being-used" object that I had been procuring said spares for NEVER SEEMS TO ACTUALLY SUSTAIN SIGNIFICANT DAMAGE, and so all of those extras that I'd carefully tucked away just "sit there for decades"... talk about a classic case of "Murphy's Law of Spares"!

by QuacksO November 23, 2018

Murphy's Law of Accessibility

Refers to the infuriating situation of something you need's usually being at the bottom of a pile, at the back of a drawer/shelf, etc.

I have a 2--vertical-layers-deep stack of plastic totes for storing my DVD-collection, arranged in alphabetical order. It's often the case that the disc I want to watch has a title that is near the end of the alphabet, though, and so I hafta laboriously remove all da rest of da crates to access the very back/bottom box... yep, a classic case of Murphy's Law of Accessibility!

by QuacksO October 13, 2018

Murphy's Law of Engine-Idling Duration

"If you leave your vehicle's engine running during a delay in proceeding (traffic-jam, road construction, accident-resolution, "stuck" red signal-light, etc.), you will be sitting there for many minutes, just wasting gas. The instant you turn the key off and climb out of your seat to stretch, however, THAT'S when the line of traffic will begin moving again, and thus you will have shut off your engine "for nothing", AND you will now be holding up everyone behind you while you hastily hop back into the driver's seat and re-start the engine so that you can move forward again."

I finally took da plunge and bought a second-hand Toyota Prius because I'd eventually had one too many cases of Murphy's Law of Engine-Idling Duration... the Prius automatically shuts down its power during stand-stills, and then uses its electric motor to provide instant mobility as soon as you're ready to go again.

by QuacksO October 20, 2018

Murphy's Law of Post-repair Reassembly

"A device that you're repairing will operate **absolutely perfectly** while you have it taken apart to work on it, but then when you get it all put back together and have all the cabinet-screws re-inserted, THAT'S when the device will decide not to work again."

To lessen the chance of getting "bitten" by Murphy's Law of Post-repair Reassembly, one should double-check everything on a refurbished device before putting it back together again.

by QuacksO March 7, 2019