blow the monkey

To bungle, screw up, fail miserably or screw the proverbial pooch.

I’ve given you three chances, and at every opportunity, you blow the monkey!

by RrrrasdfasdflRoroBinkins November 16, 2019

monkey slide

A monkey slide means an old metal playground slide in piece of vintage playground equipment from years ago between the Early 1900s to the 1990s.

An old Metal Slide in an Old Playground is a monkey slide.

by Tominator 1401. May 5, 2018

Monkey Fucker

A person who is sexually attracted to Black People, and only sexually attracted to those, they usually shove a banana up their mouth like a dildo and then fuck them in the ass, but if it's a female Black person, its rather they shove a banana up their ass and fuck them in the vagina, this can also be used as an insult to people as just calling them retarded and a slut and this word is a derogatory term toward black whores.

1. Patricia: Oh God, it's one of them Monkey Fuckers!
Lizzo: WE GOTTA RUN MY NIGGAS!

2. Candice Dikfitinyo Mouth: You're an absolute buffoon! A CLOWN!
Benjamin Dover: FUCK YOU MONKEY FUCKER!
Hugh Jass: Ooh! Bro that was too far

3. Black Whore: Man shut up you idiot-
Spongebob Squarepants: FUCK YOU MONKEY FUCKER!

4. If you're too sensitive, don't dislike, just fucking leave.

by KillMePleasePenisBallsAutismCo November 18, 2023

Hair monkey

A small gathering of ass-crack hair that's been accidentally twisted into a dreadlock while wiping, using "natural glue."

"Man, I gotta get my girlfriend to trim those hair monkeys down there--every time I wipe I pull on 'em!"

by DidgeDrone November 5, 2023

Turtle Shell On A Monkey Bar

Men who ride Harley's or other cruising type bikes, who wear turtle shell style helmets because they are not driving fast enough to need a full helmet usually. And they ride on a bike that has had custom steering handles installed. The handle bars are usually raised an additional 10 to 12 inches, making the rider appear to be hanging from a monkey bar.

"How bout that turtle shell on a monkey bar, his tiny helmet had huge skulls painted on it and he was barely able to hang onto his monkey bar because it was almost too high..."

by BOSS*bitch June 11, 2015

Monkeys

Awesome fans of Brooke monk (aka the best creator on the planet)

Those monkeys are so unproblematic

by brookemonk January 20, 2021

Monkey poo

When one hangs naked from a branch of a tree and does a poo. A variation of this can be two people hanging naked from a branch as well as holding hands and doing a poo. (Can also hang from something else at height eg: mast of boat)

Mate did you see Louis’ monkey poo last night, how did he even climb that high?

by the one and only jerusaphelt April 24, 2022