Wet computer

When you're watching pornz on your computer and your jacking then you accidentally jizz on your computer.

*wack wack wack*
OH SHIT!
(Just wet computered)

by Tits McGee 69 March 17, 2009

Apple Computer

The computer that is perfect for anyone that barely knows how to turn on a light switch.

Bob - "What computer should I buy"
Sam - "What is the square root of four"
Bob - "I don't know"
Sam - " Buy an Apple Computer"

by jimmy_the_geek April 20, 2011

fix the computer

An excuse to leave your friends, so that you can go home and masturbate.

1. Sorry guys, I uh, need to leave, I have to go home and fix the computer..

by kwhitelool August 13, 2010

Computer food

Computer food is a concept invented by my good friend Ross, and basically describes food that might as well have been made by a computer for all the human attention that has gone into it's creation. It might as well be made out of plastic for Jebus's sake.

Dude #1 (stood at burger van at some festival or other): Man, that pre-grated cheese looks totally computerised ...

Dude #2 (nods head in agreement): Fo 'sho brother mine, your computer food radar is finely tuned. Let's go get falafel instead. It sounds funnier.

by Howard Campbell December 29, 2005

computer

The most frustrating thing that costs you money when ever it breaks.

Guy: Dude i just found out that my comp has 33 viruses

Guy2: Dude your looking at too much porn

by Nick Valadao July 26, 2004

comptard

Main Entry: 1 comp·tard
Pronunciation: 'kämp-'tärd
Etymology: Modern Engrish, from Middle Haddish or Hadbrew; Middle Spanglish comptarder, from Latin comptardare, from re- + tardus slow
transitive senses
Function: verb
1 : to slow up especially by preventing or hindering advance or accomplishment with one that computes; specifically : a programmable electronic device that can store, retrieve, and process data: CYBER IMPEDE
2 : to delay academic progress by failure to promote
intransitive senses in relation to modern day technology: to undergo technological retardation
synonym see LAMER
antonym see l33t; also : bill gates
- comp·tard·er noun
Function: noun
1 : a comptarded person; also : a person held to resemble a comptarded person in behavior

1 : Karrey doesn't even know how to send images to people over the net, she's a comptard.

2 : Liz is the biggest internet nerd in a 6 state radius; She even criticizes Hadley's misspellings on urbandictionary.com, she's definitely not a comptard.

by Four1Fool August 11, 2004

apple computer

Company which either invented or was first to adopt many of the concepts, technologies and language used by desktop computer users today. In fact, the "Desktop" metaphor for the graphical representation of the computer's contents is one of the ideas that Apple refined and made popular in 1983. Microsoft later licensed the use of much of Apple's graphical user interface (the mouse pointer, the Trash / Recycle Bin, pop-up menus, etc.).

Apple Labs invented TrueType font technology, QuickTime, and IEEE-1394, among others. Apple also invented the word "multimedia," which is now used to describe most of the desktop computers sold today.
Apple is also the first company to launch a succesful commecial online music service.

If you want to see what your computer will be like in 3 or 4 years, look at a new Apple computer.

by UserX July 2, 2003