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Murphy's Law of Customer-Assistance

"You can stroll a store's aisles till Doomsday and never spot da item you want, but then, just as soon as you interrupt a staffperson to ask for help in locating said desirable, THAT'S when you will notice your sought-after item right off!"
While stocking up on food at a Super Walmart, I was looking for larger packages of Armour Vienna sausage so that I could save a few cents per can, but although I had thoroughly searched the surrounding areas on the shelves, I still hadn't found anything bigger than the small six-packs, so I finally asked a nearby employee if there were any of the larger packages in stock, possibly in the back room. Well, just as we were both walking back to the area of the aisle where I'd been looking, THAT'S when I finally spied the 12-packs that were sitting on the very top shelf! Guess that was a classic case of Murphy's Law of Customer-Assistance... ah, well, again, the 12-packs were indeed sitting very high up, so at least that was a plausible excuse for my not having seen them before, especially since the store usually doesn't even expect its customers to notice stuff that's placed 'way up there, anyway; that "lofty" location is merely where they store extra merchandise for replenishing the lower-down shelves when the stock there starts to run low.
by QuacksO May 14, 2019
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headdie murphy

The act receiving oral gratification in an Irish bar bathroom.
How’d it go last night?
Dude, We got drunk at McCray’s Pub and she ended up giving me a headdie murphy!
by CKP Team November 13, 2019
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Wet Murphy

When one falls in the Balimore harbor, and then fcks someone with “harbor cock”.
Dude, I feel so bad.. I wet Murphy’d her… she knew I was in there too!

Don’t tell ANYONE, but I got wet Murphied.. I already made an appointment with Dr. Dan.
by Dirty Dimen November 7, 2021
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Murphy

Murphy is a fun loving friend. she is a jokester at times but is gery focused when she needs to be. She is very responsible and is very helping. She is smart, but doesnt think she is. She will make fun of you, but in the end its all a joks. She is always up with the latest trends. She always knows how to make someone feel better and get them to laugh. She can always hang out when you are free. Murphy is a great best friend.
Liliana: omg that murphy girl seems so nice!
Ella: ya, she is super nice and very funny
by Poopybuttfacehole4375 November 24, 2018
mugGet the Murphymug.
"The desirability of and/or your need for an item at a garage sale will be in direct inverse proportion to the likelihood of your actually being able to purchase it."
The four most common/infuriating occasions when Murphy's Law of Garage Sales holds true:
(1) A desired item is something that's just stored in the family's garage; it’s not one of the items for sale.
(2) The item has already been sold, and the homeowner is just “holding” it till the buyer gets back with either the money or a vehicle to transport the item to his own home.
(3) The item is too expensive, and the seller will not budge on the price. (Note: this is not always an "all hope is lost" situation --- you may have at least two additional options. First, try coming back again later in the day to see if the item is still unsold --- if YOU think that the item is overpriced, then most OTHER yard-sailers may think so, too, and so nobody else may have bought the item yet, either, giving you a second crack at possibly purchasing it at a reduced price, especially since by now the seller may likely feel a bit "desperate" to get rid of it. And second, have a glance at the trash-heap out front of the person’s house that evening --- sometimes unsold yard-sale items will simply be tossed out, and so you can then get them for free.)
(4) The item is something that you would logically want to test out first to make sure it operates satisfactorily, but there is no hookup for electricity/water/telephone/internet/antenna/audio/video at the site of the sale, and the stubborn owner will not allow you to either bring the item into his house or temporarily take it somewhere else to test it.
by QuacksO August 1, 2018
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Esteban Murphy

Guy 1: I’ll be online tonight

Guy 2: No you won’t, you’re such an Esteban Murphy
by Johnnyon the spot July 26, 2022
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Murphy's Law of Gambling

"You can patronize the slots till Doomsday or buy any number of scratch-off tickets and never gain any significant winnings, but then just as soon as you stop playing, the very next player will win big."
Many an addicted gamer believes in Murphy's Law of Gambling, even though it is indeed :"all chance" and thus seldom actually works out that way.
by QuacksO September 12, 2019
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