turd testicle

When you take a shit and it doesn't come all the way out so it just dangles like a testicle.

Bro 1: Damn, I just took the worst shit of my life yesterday!

Bro 2: Was it a turd testicle?

Bro 1: Yeee maan...

by jenny56868 August 13, 2011

lava turds

Liquid shit that is so hot it oozes out of your ass like lava.

After eating the cheese rolls from Taco Bell, MArk had to drop off some serious lava turds.

by snarky1 May 24, 2009

Houdini Turd

When your sitting on the toilet for atleast 20 minutes and it feels as if the biggest turd has came out of your rectum; when you get up to wipe there's nothing in the bowl.

After twenty minutes of sitting on the crapper Johnny got up to whip and comes to find nothing there but a Houdini Turd.

by Lueckmans November 8, 2009

turd hearse

A manure spreader; device commonly used by farmers to spread livestock feces on their fields to use as fertilizer.

"Dad's out in the field, pulling the turd hearse behind his tractor. He cleaned the hog house today."

by oldgeezer March 6, 2010

turd searching

Throwing up in the toilet, with one's head over the bowl as if one was searching for excrement.

Joe: Hey where did Tyler go?

Tom: He's turd searching after trying the hour of power. Give him some time

by Mike LaTorrez January 3, 2013

Perfume on a Turd

** See lipstick on a pig

When my friends ex-girlfriend was taking too long to get ready to go out one night, another buddy said "What's the point? You might as well try to put perfume on a turd."

by desertcajun October 26, 2008

Turd Alchemy

An unproven, purely theoretical construct that the psychological disorder known as Golden Turd Syndrome is based on, which is the idea that one’s shits are “golden” and that one is a human god and therefore can do no wrong and should not be confined by the laws that apply to others.

Turd Alchemy is the underlying irrational and pervasive pseudoscientific delusion responsible for the ongoing deification of Trump and his cronies by so many of today’s Republicans.

by Dr Bunnygirl September 22, 2022