one-wipe wonder

the rare occasion when you take a shit and only have to wipe once

Friend: well you weren't in there for long
Me: it was a one-wipe wonder

by Rammit Inmah Asshol May 18, 2017

ghetto wet wipe

When you have a raw asshole or you're just environmental so you fold some TP over 3 times and put a little spittle on it to wipe your ass with a moist cloth rather than raw TP.

Wet wives clog the drains, even the flushable ones, so I use the ghetto wet wipe.

by brosefballin February 25, 2020

fucken ass wipe

This person doesn't care about anyone else but themselves. They treat others like shit and don't care about the feelings of others as long as they get what they want.

Look at that fucken ass wipe on his cell phone racing up to the stop sign looking like he's going to blow through it. He doesn't even care that I had to slam on my brakes thinking he wasn't going to stop.

by jimmybomm June 22, 2021

Wiping a brown marker

When you're wiping your ass and it never seems to stop.

Last night, I was wiping a brown marker for fifteen minutes.

by Ghettomemester May 26, 2017

Lyrical Ass-wipe

A person who pretends to like music based on the musical quality, when truly they just like the song because the words are catchy or semi-funny.

LA-w "Dude, I really enjoy Poker Face by Lady Gaga for the quality of the electro-synchronization."
Me "quit being such a lyrical ass-wipe"

by TrickyDick69er February 4, 2010

One Wipe Tuesday

This is to be celebrated on the second Tuesday of every year. After taking a poop on this special day, you wipe your butt once, and only once. No exceptions. It doesn’t matter how large or smelly the poop is, you only wipe once.

Brett: Oh my god! Why do you smell like shit?!
Cameron: It’s one wipe Tuesday! Don’t tell me you’ve been wiping more than once!

by blaneficker January 12, 2021

Ass Wipe Paper

Another way to say toilet paper

I need some ass wipe paper

by (534nz4)(20th century, +85 years) February 1, 2008