Orphan Turd

A turd that is left behind after you flush the toilet.

Paul glanced back at the toilet to find a stubborn orphan turd still circling the bowl.

by Largetarget May 28, 2018

Speed Turd

A small speed bump that you don't have to slow down for.

Driver: Speeding, going 55 in a 25.

Passenger: yells slow down, watch out for that speed bump!

Driver: hits it going full speed then says"Oh thats just a speed turd"

by CJ Stuntin March 30, 2010

turd mentality

the mental state of someone who cannot articulate the difference between herd immunity and herd mentality

President Trump displayed another shining moment of turd mentality when speaking about COVID this week.

by Slamb Doctor September 16, 2020

turd hearse

A manure spreader; device commonly used by farmers to spread livestock feces on their fields to use as fertilizer.

"Dad's out in the field, pulling the turd hearse behind his tractor. He cleaned the hog house today."

by oldgeezer March 6, 2010

Compass turd

A compass turd is created when a person Eats two consecutive high fiber meals. The first meal is exceptionally high in protein, and the second laden with fats. The eater then passes both meals in the same defecation. The high fiber content in the compass turd will hold a sturdy log, and the dense protein packed end sinks to the bottom of toilet bowl while the buoyant, fatty pole will float to the surface, leaving the compass turd pointing straight up and down.

The scout master taught the intrepid scouts how to lay a compass turd, along with many tricks and techniques of orientation in wilderness. The scouts who could birth the best fecal compass were granted an ornate and venerable badge denoting their glorious ever-skyward turd

by fullyregressed January 15, 2014

Turd Alchemy

An unproven, purely theoretical construct that the psychological disorder known as Golden Turd Syndrome is based on, which is the idea that one’s shits are “golden” and that one is a human god and therefore can do no wrong and should not be confined by the laws that apply to others.

Turd Alchemy is the underlying irrational and pervasive pseudoscientific delusion responsible for the ongoing deification of Trump and his cronies by so many of today’s Republicans.

by Dr Bunnygirl September 22, 2022

turd searching

Throwing up in the toilet, with one's head over the bowl as if one was searching for excrement.

Joe: Hey where did Tyler go?

Tom: He's turd searching after trying the hour of power. Give him some time

by Mike LaTorrez January 3, 2013