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Squat Cobbler

Noun. When a pie is desecrated by bare human buttocks. Situation made worse when said human is crying
He has a private video stash of himself doing crying squat cobbler for another man.
by SquigglySquid September 3, 2016
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squat cobbler

A person that is fully clothed, sits on any pie.(Boston cream pie, peach, Apple, and cherry). A costume is often involved. Variations include crybaby squat cobbler where the said person is crying, or also known as Boston cream splat east of the Rockies.
Hey jack let's make a squat cobbler video.

Hey Jim can I buy some pies for my squat cobbler group tonight.
by Agggg33 September 3, 2016
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hoboken squat cobbler

A fetish involving watching someone sitting their posterior into a pie (preferably apple or pumpkin, but this is up to the fetishist) and wiggling said buttocks around in the aforementioned dessert
Jimmy: Yo, did you catch that Hoboken Squat Cobbler video on the Tube?

Chuck: Yeah man, got me rock hard
by cellophanefriend September 3, 2016
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squat cobbler

The act of putting one's buttocks into a fresh pie, and wiggling their cheeks back and forth.

Some prefer that Squat Cobbler also involve the participant crying while performing the act.
Dude, don't eat that Key Lime Pie! Pryce just used it for squat cobbler!
by bigjohnston September 3, 2016
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Squat cobbler

Fetish whereas sexual gratification is achieved by sitting on pies and or pastries. Cream pies and meringues are the most commonly used for safety reasons.
Kim:What's your turn on baby?
Sal: I'm a squat cobbler.
Kim: That's hot. Let me get you a French Silk pie.
by Clive Bixby September 3, 2016
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squat cobbler

When a man sits in a pie and wiggles around.

Also known as a full moon moon pie.
Mr. Wormhole's baseball cards were stolen, along with his squat cobbler videos.
by zomgx3 September 3, 2016
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squat cobbler

When a fully clothed man sits in a type of pie, the squatter also usually produces tears while performing the squats.
She has a squat cobbler fetish.
by JoeSmith94 September 3, 2016
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